Most people that strike up a conversation with Posey at the moment hear "Sister coming soon. Helping mummy look after baby" or "My toys are mine". Bless Posey :) only time will tell whether she understands we're having a real baby who will need lots of care or whether she thinks it's a doll!
I've had loads of chats with Posey over the months about the baby arriving and how special it'll be, but that we'll have to work together to look after the baby by sharing toys, going out together, reading books together and all getting on well. Posey may not have walked until she was 18mths old but boy can she talk!! I'm not a competitive mum by any stretch but I will say Posey's verbal communication is pretty impressive for a child not yet 2.5. I think the fact she can express her thoughts, needs and requirements in words keeps many terrible twos moments at bay as for her, the frustration of not being understood isn't there. What I will say though, is she gets Buzz and me to herself an awful lot of the time and that is all about to change, which does worry me!!!
We spend hours reading to her, building duplo towers, playing at the park / soft play, going to the farm etc etc. Posey is our lives! We both feel we need to do the same things with her once the baby arrives and also both still spend plenty of time on our own with her too. I've chosen to bottle feed the baby from birth as I think that will really help me be able to still do things with just Posey and me. She says "I love mummy and Posey days" regularly. I really do too! I will express like Daisy the cow to get as much of the good stuff I can for the new baby but I do believe formula milk is just as good plus Buzz and I can share the feeds / bonding sessions with the baby. We both want Posey to feel secure and like her world has only got better, not that some of her favourite things have suddenly stopped. Posey also refers to herself as "Mummy's helper" often too, so we will encourage her to help us by doing things like sitting next to us when feeding the baby and showing the baby pictures in books, choosing outfits for the baby, passing us nappies at change time, singing to the baby and, as she puts it "looking after the baby in the car." Hopefully we can keep any terrible twos behaviour to a minimum. One thing is for certain...I daren't give the baby any hand me downs...everything is "Posey's!!!!!!!". I think you have to puck your battles as a parent, and that is not one I will choose....
x
Sunday 22 December 2013
Few pregnancy aches & pains for me + Nexcare review
I have friends who (I'll say this as constructively as possible) have moaned from start to finish during their pregnancies. Although pregnancy is not an illness, far from it - for me it really is a blessing & I feel incredibly fortunate to be about to have my second baby. Pregnancy related ailments can make you feel a little off colour from time to time. I think I've gotten off pretty lightly both times as I've never had sickness, stretch marks, SPD, oily hair, skin breakouts or swelling in my hands & feet. I have found ways to ease the aches I have had and so far am still as active as ever & really enjoying my pregnancy. Here's a few things that have affected me and how I've overcome them:
1. First & third trimester tiredness.
It really does just hit you! Feeling tired isn't great, especially not if you're working or have other children (or both..). There's so much going on in your body during pregnancy that it's hard to sleep sometimes at night and then nap during the day as you can always rely on car horns, couriers, barking dogs & other people to disturb you! A mix of Spa Tone iron supplements, vitamin c through freshly squeezed orange (followed by gaviscon to reduce the heartburn risk) and a nice Jo Malone candle has worked wonders to help me sleep. My dream genii pillow has helped me stay comfortable and a mug of hot milk before bed really relaxes me.
2. Crampy legs - ouch!!! Pregnancy yoga taught me to circle my ankles on awaking in the night and keep my legs moving through the day (easy with a 2 year old!). Thankfully my legs aren't too crampy now and I know what to do when they are.
3. Lower back ache - I have only had a little of this fortunately and it's been very connected to particular activities, eg. Leaning into my rabbit hutches to clean them, crawling around soft play with Posey, not bending my knees properly when lifting things. Nexcare kindly sent me a Maternity Support to try and I love it. I feel supported! It makes my bump feel comfortable and secure.
The maternity support is just 1 product from Nexcare's range of antenatal & postnatal products, retailing for around £38 in Mothercare and Baby specialist stores. You can't tell I'm wearing it and it doesn't dig in or scratch my skin. I will most definitely wear it for my remaining weeks of pregnancy.
4. Emotions! Oh boy, I have a fair few days when I could just cry! I have no other explanation for this other than there are so many hormones flying around my body just now that sometimes they take over! My solution? Meet a friend for a play date, take Posey to the farm (she loves animals), get a nice hot drink and magazine, retail therapy or get my nails manicured! Simple things....
Here's to a healthy, ache-free last few weeks of pregnancy :)x
1. First & third trimester tiredness.
It really does just hit you! Feeling tired isn't great, especially not if you're working or have other children (or both..). There's so much going on in your body during pregnancy that it's hard to sleep sometimes at night and then nap during the day as you can always rely on car horns, couriers, barking dogs & other people to disturb you! A mix of Spa Tone iron supplements, vitamin c through freshly squeezed orange (followed by gaviscon to reduce the heartburn risk) and a nice Jo Malone candle has worked wonders to help me sleep. My dream genii pillow has helped me stay comfortable and a mug of hot milk before bed really relaxes me.
2. Crampy legs - ouch!!! Pregnancy yoga taught me to circle my ankles on awaking in the night and keep my legs moving through the day (easy with a 2 year old!). Thankfully my legs aren't too crampy now and I know what to do when they are.
3. Lower back ache - I have only had a little of this fortunately and it's been very connected to particular activities, eg. Leaning into my rabbit hutches to clean them, crawling around soft play with Posey, not bending my knees properly when lifting things. Nexcare kindly sent me a Maternity Support to try and I love it. I feel supported! It makes my bump feel comfortable and secure.
4. Emotions! Oh boy, I have a fair few days when I could just cry! I have no other explanation for this other than there are so many hormones flying around my body just now that sometimes they take over! My solution? Meet a friend for a play date, take Posey to the farm (she loves animals), get a nice hot drink and magazine, retail therapy or get my nails manicured! Simple things....
Here's to a healthy, ache-free last few weeks of pregnancy :)x
34 weeks pregnant!
Wow! So today I am 34 weeks pregnant! I can't quite believe how close the big day is getting but I sure am feeling pretty excited, and I do feel ready. I think posey is excited but Buzz isn't quite ready...it will be a bolt out of the blue when things start to happen. A lot of dads I know have been like this - they shut it out until they need to spring into action. Not like us mums to be - we must be mentally & physically prepared!!
Today Buzz has taken Posey to the park & soft play. He's had plenty of work functions and long days in the run up to Christmas so Posey and I have had lots of time with just the two of us. Lovely of course, but pretty full on as she's now dropped her daytime nap and with my huge bump soft play isn't really for me just now!!
I saw my midwife last week & all seems well with the baby, thankfully. She believes the baby is engaged though, so could arrive very soon or could stay put for a while yet. Having had steroid injections at 30wks to help mature the baby's lungs, I feel ok about an early arrival as the neonatal-stay risk will be a little lower. I gave my heart set on being in and out of hospital pretty quickly this time so things aren't too unsettled for Posey.
I feel good. Between loo breaks, drinks, snacks, achy legs, baby kicking at night etc I squeeze in 7-8hrs of sleep each night, which is pretty amazing! I'm really on top of things at home & I've handed over my businesses it staff now so I'm getting plenty of chill out time.
My midwife dates calculated that Posey was born at 35+5 weeks but my IVF dates were 35+1 weeks. Based on those latter dates if this one is as impatient as Posey I could be giving birth in 8 days time - what a happy new year that would be!!! Babies really do work to their own agenda. I'm ready whenever she's ready to pop out.
x
Today Buzz has taken Posey to the park & soft play. He's had plenty of work functions and long days in the run up to Christmas so Posey and I have had lots of time with just the two of us. Lovely of course, but pretty full on as she's now dropped her daytime nap and with my huge bump soft play isn't really for me just now!!
I saw my midwife last week & all seems well with the baby, thankfully. She believes the baby is engaged though, so could arrive very soon or could stay put for a while yet. Having had steroid injections at 30wks to help mature the baby's lungs, I feel ok about an early arrival as the neonatal-stay risk will be a little lower. I gave my heart set on being in and out of hospital pretty quickly this time so things aren't too unsettled for Posey.
I feel good. Between loo breaks, drinks, snacks, achy legs, baby kicking at night etc I squeeze in 7-8hrs of sleep each night, which is pretty amazing! I'm really on top of things at home & I've handed over my businesses it staff now so I'm getting plenty of chill out time.
My midwife dates calculated that Posey was born at 35+5 weeks but my IVF dates were 35+1 weeks. Based on those latter dates if this one is as impatient as Posey I could be giving birth in 8 days time - what a happy new year that would be!!! Babies really do work to their own agenda. I'm ready whenever she's ready to pop out.
x
Sunday 17 November 2013
My top nursery purchases
I think it's safe to say that kitting out a nursery second time around has been a lot more straightforward than when I was pregnant with Posey.
Being pregnant for the first time, I felt excited but dumb-founded every time I went into a baby shop! I just didn't know where to start. Buzz and I were clueless!
There is a mass of useful information online and available through antenatal groups, such as NCT classes. The best source of advice I found was experienced mums. Mum friends who'd already had a baby or were on the second / third babies. This time I pulled together a list of everything that worked well for Posey and I've bought it for the new baby. She might be a completely different baby but at least I feel prepared!
So here are my best buys:
1. Bugaboo Bee.
Posey had an icandy peach. I loved it and wouldn't have swapped it for the world for the first 9 mths but once I started using the microlite stroller for short trips I found the icandy heavy, bulky and a little awkward to keep in the car. This time I wanted something that both the baby and Posey can use. I wanted an adaptable, lightweight, stylish and easy to use travel system.
The great thing about the Bee is it ticks all of those boxes. The baby's maxi cosi car seat can clip on the base with the pushchair seat still in place, rather than having to swap them. The carrycot is a cocoon which lies flat in the pushchair seat, meaning no separate carrycot to store. The idea Buzz and I have is that either the baby can be in her car seat or cocoon with Posey walking or on the buggy
board, or Posey can be in the pushchair and the baby can be in the baby bjorn carrier. Posey doesn't
use a pushchair much now so it felt silly buying a double.
We chose the Bugaboo Bee All Black special edition at £529, with off white accessories including cocoon, footmuff & parasol. We also have a buggy board and maxi cosi adaptors so we can easily clip the baby's car seat onto the base.
2. Maxi Cosi Cabriofix and footmuff.
The baby is due on Feb 2, so it will be cold!! Mothercare ran a promotion recently and we got a free cabriofix car seat when we bought the Bugaboo. It was great! To save us flagging with snow suits and blankets depending on if we're inside or out we bought a footmuff that just unzips, keeping the baby either warm or cold. I think it'll work really well.
3. Dr Browns feeding equipment.
Breast feeding didn't work out with Posey and I feel so scarred from it that this time my baby will be formula fed from the start. I'd love to express too, but all of her milk will be bottle fed.
Buzz and I bought everything from Dr Browns! Their bottles were the only ones that agreed with Posey and stopped her being refluxy. We found them after trying and giving up on Avent, Tommee Tippee, Medela and Mam bottles through wind-induced lack of sleep!
We have bought an electric steriliser, 12 feeding bottles (10 of which are special edition pink - yay!!), an electric bottle warmer and a selection of follow-on teats.
4. Next Baby clothes.
I love shopping for baby clothes. There are such gorgeous pieces in the shops, particularly in at he White Company, JoJo Maman Bebe and Le Petit Bateau. Great for presents! When buying for my own baby though, and knowing how many vests and sleep suits she'll rattle through on leaky nappy / sick / milk dribble days I wanted nice clothes that didn't cost me the earth.
I find that sizing is fairly inconsistent between stores and supermarket sizes can be huge! The baby clothes I have from Next though, are great-sized for birthweight, wash well, dry well, don't lose their shape and are stylish. All of my new baby's clothes are from Next and I know they will be fab.
Note to friends - presents from TWC, JoJo & Le P Bateau though ;)x
5. Bloom highchair.
I love them! They may cost £400 upwards but boy are they worth it! With the baby snug and 3 different recline positions you can use them from birth. Posey has used hers every day from birth and is now 2 and 3mths. I can't see her stopping using it any time soon. She never resists it and refuses to give it to the baby! So we got another one....
The baby will have a white highchair and orange seat insert. Her snug will go in the seat fully tilted backwards until she can sit unaided, at which point the tray will go on for her. Having the Bloom Fresco Loft means she is at work top height in the kitchen rather than in a bouncer on the floor and she can sit with us at the breakfast bar.
What are your best baby buys?
x
Being pregnant for the first time, I felt excited but dumb-founded every time I went into a baby shop! I just didn't know where to start. Buzz and I were clueless!
There is a mass of useful information online and available through antenatal groups, such as NCT classes. The best source of advice I found was experienced mums. Mum friends who'd already had a baby or were on the second / third babies. This time I pulled together a list of everything that worked well for Posey and I've bought it for the new baby. She might be a completely different baby but at least I feel prepared!
So here are my best buys:
1. Bugaboo Bee.
Posey had an icandy peach. I loved it and wouldn't have swapped it for the world for the first 9 mths but once I started using the microlite stroller for short trips I found the icandy heavy, bulky and a little awkward to keep in the car. This time I wanted something that both the baby and Posey can use. I wanted an adaptable, lightweight, stylish and easy to use travel system.
The great thing about the Bee is it ticks all of those boxes. The baby's maxi cosi car seat can clip on the base with the pushchair seat still in place, rather than having to swap them. The carrycot is a cocoon which lies flat in the pushchair seat, meaning no separate carrycot to store. The idea Buzz and I have is that either the baby can be in her car seat or cocoon with Posey walking or on the buggy
board, or Posey can be in the pushchair and the baby can be in the baby bjorn carrier. Posey doesn't
use a pushchair much now so it felt silly buying a double.
We chose the Bugaboo Bee All Black special edition at £529, with off white accessories including cocoon, footmuff & parasol. We also have a buggy board and maxi cosi adaptors so we can easily clip the baby's car seat onto the base.
2. Maxi Cosi Cabriofix and footmuff.
The baby is due on Feb 2, so it will be cold!! Mothercare ran a promotion recently and we got a free cabriofix car seat when we bought the Bugaboo. It was great! To save us flagging with snow suits and blankets depending on if we're inside or out we bought a footmuff that just unzips, keeping the baby either warm or cold. I think it'll work really well.
3. Dr Browns feeding equipment.
Breast feeding didn't work out with Posey and I feel so scarred from it that this time my baby will be formula fed from the start. I'd love to express too, but all of her milk will be bottle fed.
Buzz and I bought everything from Dr Browns! Their bottles were the only ones that agreed with Posey and stopped her being refluxy. We found them after trying and giving up on Avent, Tommee Tippee, Medela and Mam bottles through wind-induced lack of sleep!
We have bought an electric steriliser, 12 feeding bottles (10 of which are special edition pink - yay!!), an electric bottle warmer and a selection of follow-on teats.
4. Next Baby clothes.
I love shopping for baby clothes. There are such gorgeous pieces in the shops, particularly in at he White Company, JoJo Maman Bebe and Le Petit Bateau. Great for presents! When buying for my own baby though, and knowing how many vests and sleep suits she'll rattle through on leaky nappy / sick / milk dribble days I wanted nice clothes that didn't cost me the earth.
I find that sizing is fairly inconsistent between stores and supermarket sizes can be huge! The baby clothes I have from Next though, are great-sized for birthweight, wash well, dry well, don't lose their shape and are stylish. All of my new baby's clothes are from Next and I know they will be fab.
Note to friends - presents from TWC, JoJo & Le P Bateau though ;)x
5. Bloom highchair.
I love them! They may cost £400 upwards but boy are they worth it! With the baby snug and 3 different recline positions you can use them from birth. Posey has used hers every day from birth and is now 2 and 3mths. I can't see her stopping using it any time soon. She never resists it and refuses to give it to the baby! So we got another one....
The baby will have a white highchair and orange seat insert. Her snug will go in the seat fully tilted backwards until she can sit unaided, at which point the tray will go on for her. Having the Bloom Fresco Loft means she is at work top height in the kitchen rather than in a bouncer on the floor and she can sit with us at the breakfast bar.
What are your best baby buys?
x
Into Week 30 of pregnancy!
Firstly, it really has been a number of weeks since I last blogged, so apologies for the lack of updates! If you follow me on twitter you'll have seen a few snippets I'm sure. It really has been manic recently!!!
Today I am 29 weeks pregnant! It's a great feeling and I'm immensely proud of my big bump (which actually measures a little on the large side but we won't worry about that just yet..)
My second trimester was pretty easy going. I felt fortunate. I had plenty of energy, ate well, Posey was well behaved and Buzz and I did lots of preparation getting the bedroom ready for our new baby girl. In fact, right now the only remaining purchase is the isofix base for her car seat! We 've delayed that as I'm having a new car delivered this week and will pop into John Lewis for a fitting once it's here.
So it's been very busy preparing the baby's bedroom. Many people have commented on how organised I've been with it. The truth is I'm terrified of having another early birth so want to stay in control as far as possible! I was also aware that once my third trimester started the tiredness, heartburn and patchy sleep at night could start at any time, and boy was I right! Now most things are done I am spending a considerably greater amount of time relaxing and enjoying me time. Buzz is being great with Posey and I've cut my work commitments right back, including selling one of my three businesses. I really want to look after myself and stay pregnant for as long as possible. If the baby arrives early I don't want to feel as if me being super-busy and un-chilled out as contributed to it. It's world prematurity day today and I remember vividly the emotions I went through when posey arrived early and spent time on SCBU. It was tough and I don't want to be there again.
I started a pregnancy yoga class in October. I love it! I sleep like a log afterwards and I find it very very relaxing. I'll keep going as long as I'm able to. I'd totally recommend it. I've been doing some gentle TRX and Pilates with my personal trainer too. I'll do that after the birth as well. Posey used to sleep in her car seat while I did it last time so hopefully this time I'll be able to do it again, while Posey is at preschool and the baby is asleep! Fingers crossed!
x
Ps. I shall blog more about family, The terrible-twos and my top nursery purchases very soon x
Today I am 29 weeks pregnant! It's a great feeling and I'm immensely proud of my big bump (which actually measures a little on the large side but we won't worry about that just yet..)
My second trimester was pretty easy going. I felt fortunate. I had plenty of energy, ate well, Posey was well behaved and Buzz and I did lots of preparation getting the bedroom ready for our new baby girl. In fact, right now the only remaining purchase is the isofix base for her car seat! We 've delayed that as I'm having a new car delivered this week and will pop into John Lewis for a fitting once it's here.
So it's been very busy preparing the baby's bedroom. Many people have commented on how organised I've been with it. The truth is I'm terrified of having another early birth so want to stay in control as far as possible! I was also aware that once my third trimester started the tiredness, heartburn and patchy sleep at night could start at any time, and boy was I right! Now most things are done I am spending a considerably greater amount of time relaxing and enjoying me time. Buzz is being great with Posey and I've cut my work commitments right back, including selling one of my three businesses. I really want to look after myself and stay pregnant for as long as possible. If the baby arrives early I don't want to feel as if me being super-busy and un-chilled out as contributed to it. It's world prematurity day today and I remember vividly the emotions I went through when posey arrived early and spent time on SCBU. It was tough and I don't want to be there again.
I started a pregnancy yoga class in October. I love it! I sleep like a log afterwards and I find it very very relaxing. I'll keep going as long as I'm able to. I'd totally recommend it. I've been doing some gentle TRX and Pilates with my personal trainer too. I'll do that after the birth as well. Posey used to sleep in her car seat while I did it last time so hopefully this time I'll be able to do it again, while Posey is at preschool and the baby is asleep! Fingers crossed!
x
Ps. I shall blog more about family, The terrible-twos and my top nursery purchases very soon x
Friday 30 August 2013
Almost 18 weeks :)
Wow, it feels like a long time since I've updated my blog, and I guess it has been a month so I'm right!
The last month has been pretty busy and very soon I'll be officially half way through my pregnancy, so time really is flying. My energy is well and truly back, and I feel like I'm making the most of my 'nice' second trimester. It really is true that you should aim to do whatever big things in your life you need to do during the second trimester, as the first and third can be pretty hard going.
At 16 weeks Buzz and I had an extra 'reassurance' scan at a local private clinic. It was so lovely to see our little baby rolling around and kicking about on the screen. Thankfully everything still looks ok! We also found out we are expecting a little girl! It will be so nice for Posey to have a little sister :)
It was also Posey's birthday last week so we threw her a big Peppa Pig party with 25 of her friends and more soft play than you could imagine! She had a great time. I used to dream of being able to have big parties for my kids during those years when I wondered if it would ever happen. I feel very very fortunate to be able to hold those parties now.
My third business has also taken off well, which I'm really round of. I shall milk it as much as possible before taking a little time off in the new year as my due date approaches!
Another thing I've been doing is writing my list of baby purchases. We pretty much gave away or sold everything we used when Posey was a baby as I felt like I needed closure in case we were never lucky enough to have another child. So I'm getting pretty excited abut hitting John Lewis, JoJo Maman Bebe and Next to start buying for our baby. We're having her bedroom decorated when I'm around 22 weeks so after that we'll buy the furniture, blind, curtains and everything else she'll need. We're also having new carpets fitted when I'll be around 24 weeks so that will be nice! I kind of feel like 34 weeks is 'time up' for 2 reasons. Firstly, I'll be 34 wees at Christmas and it would be great to just focus on enjoying Christmas with Buzz and Posey rather than feel in a rush to get the baby's room ready. Secondly, Posey arrived at 35 weeks so I'm terrified the new baby will be earlier! So weeks 22-34 are going to be very busy with decorating, carpet fitting, baby buying and generally us getting ready!
Our next stop is my 20 week scan. That is on September 18, so is not far away at all. Fingers crossed everything with the baby will still look like it's developing well and we will get some more lovely pictures of our beautiful baby girl x
The last month has been pretty busy and very soon I'll be officially half way through my pregnancy, so time really is flying. My energy is well and truly back, and I feel like I'm making the most of my 'nice' second trimester. It really is true that you should aim to do whatever big things in your life you need to do during the second trimester, as the first and third can be pretty hard going.
At 16 weeks Buzz and I had an extra 'reassurance' scan at a local private clinic. It was so lovely to see our little baby rolling around and kicking about on the screen. Thankfully everything still looks ok! We also found out we are expecting a little girl! It will be so nice for Posey to have a little sister :)
It was also Posey's birthday last week so we threw her a big Peppa Pig party with 25 of her friends and more soft play than you could imagine! She had a great time. I used to dream of being able to have big parties for my kids during those years when I wondered if it would ever happen. I feel very very fortunate to be able to hold those parties now.
My third business has also taken off well, which I'm really round of. I shall milk it as much as possible before taking a little time off in the new year as my due date approaches!
Another thing I've been doing is writing my list of baby purchases. We pretty much gave away or sold everything we used when Posey was a baby as I felt like I needed closure in case we were never lucky enough to have another child. So I'm getting pretty excited abut hitting John Lewis, JoJo Maman Bebe and Next to start buying for our baby. We're having her bedroom decorated when I'm around 22 weeks so after that we'll buy the furniture, blind, curtains and everything else she'll need. We're also having new carpets fitted when I'll be around 24 weeks so that will be nice! I kind of feel like 34 weeks is 'time up' for 2 reasons. Firstly, I'll be 34 wees at Christmas and it would be great to just focus on enjoying Christmas with Buzz and Posey rather than feel in a rush to get the baby's room ready. Secondly, Posey arrived at 35 weeks so I'm terrified the new baby will be earlier! So weeks 22-34 are going to be very busy with decorating, carpet fitting, baby buying and generally us getting ready!
Our next stop is my 20 week scan. That is on September 18, so is not far away at all. Fingers crossed everything with the baby will still look like it's developing well and we will get some more lovely pictures of our beautiful baby girl x
Monday 29 July 2013
Second trimester here I come!
So today I am 13 weeks pregnant. 13 weeks and I'm still struggling to believe I'm fortunate enough for this to be happening to me again and also spending much of my time wondering if I really am pregnant or if it's a dream!
Last week Buzz and I went together for our 12 week scan. We were pretty much straight in there (with a very full bladder...) so there wasn't much waiting around. We saw our baby straight away on the monitor, moving and kicking around! We also saw the heartbeat and as I arched my hips so the sonographer could get a better view we saw 2 little legs & feet and two arms! It amazed me this time (as it did last time) how much you can see on a little baby who measures little more than 12cm in length! Our baby's face was very clear, we could see the nasal bone and we even got a little wave :)
Our baby is measuring bang on for dates, with a good heartbeat and the nuchal fold measurement was 1.6mm. The sonographer told us that anything over 2.5mm would be a concern. We have gone for the combined nuchal fold test this time so are currently awaiting the results of my blood tests in order for the midwives to work out our risk factor for Down's syndrome & other chromosomal abnormalities. If we are a high risk, we will receive a phone call within 7 working days (we're now on day 5) and if we are lower risk they will write to us. Hopefully we will receive a letter in the post and not a phone call.
Over the last week I've felt pretty good. It was so nice to see our baby again and know that it's developing correctly. We have told a number of our close friends & family this week that we are expecting a little brother or sister for Violet. Everyone has been thrilled for us! I have also done a little online shopping of the maternity ranges at Topshop and asos.com so I now have some lovely, comfy, fashionable clothes that will see me through this pregnancy. I am loving my elasticated waistband jeans as my tummy seems to be getting bigger each day!
I have also launched my third business over the last week, which I'm really proud of. Being at home being a mum and working as & when it suits me is definitely for me.
x
Last week Buzz and I went together for our 12 week scan. We were pretty much straight in there (with a very full bladder...) so there wasn't much waiting around. We saw our baby straight away on the monitor, moving and kicking around! We also saw the heartbeat and as I arched my hips so the sonographer could get a better view we saw 2 little legs & feet and two arms! It amazed me this time (as it did last time) how much you can see on a little baby who measures little more than 12cm in length! Our baby's face was very clear, we could see the nasal bone and we even got a little wave :)
Our baby is measuring bang on for dates, with a good heartbeat and the nuchal fold measurement was 1.6mm. The sonographer told us that anything over 2.5mm would be a concern. We have gone for the combined nuchal fold test this time so are currently awaiting the results of my blood tests in order for the midwives to work out our risk factor for Down's syndrome & other chromosomal abnormalities. If we are a high risk, we will receive a phone call within 7 working days (we're now on day 5) and if we are lower risk they will write to us. Hopefully we will receive a letter in the post and not a phone call.
Over the last week I've felt pretty good. It was so nice to see our baby again and know that it's developing correctly. We have told a number of our close friends & family this week that we are expecting a little brother or sister for Violet. Everyone has been thrilled for us! I have also done a little online shopping of the maternity ranges at Topshop and asos.com so I now have some lovely, comfy, fashionable clothes that will see me through this pregnancy. I am loving my elasticated waistband jeans as my tummy seems to be getting bigger each day!
I have also launched my third business over the last week, which I'm really proud of. Being at home being a mum and working as & when it suits me is definitely for me.
x
Sunday 21 July 2013
Hurray hurray! 12 weeks pregnant today!
Wowzers, I feel like I've reached a magical milestone today - the 12 week mark!
I feel very fortunate to have just written the above sentence as my twitter feed is currently littered with a lot of BFNs, news of miscarriage, girls not responding to IVF treatment and those waiting to start treatment. Pregnancy really is a blessing and does not always come easily.
Today Buzz, Posey and I are just chilling at home. It's the perfect family Sunday really as the weather is lovely and we can use the garden. We have all the patio doors open at the back of the house so we can just potter around!
Tuesday is a big day as that's when Buzz and I have our 12 week scan to confirm dates and ensure the baby is developing correctly, I have no reason to believe things aren't as they should be but naturally there's fear in my mind that something might not be right. I have lots of things to keep me busy until Tuesday and then our scan is at 8.50am so will be here before I know it hopefully.
Tuesday is also Posey's first day at preschool. She's now 23 months and is graduating from nursery to preschool at her current school. She has to wear a uniform from now on! Scary stuff! Hopefully she'll settle in well. Lots of her friends are moving with her so she'll be with familiar faces.
I had to start taking Pregaday iron tablets this week as my iron levels were low. I had been feeling very very tired and a little dizzy from time to time and now I feel much less so, so hopefully they ,ve made a good difference. I have to take them until the baby arrives.
I'm also still taking my pregnacare supplements daily as well as my crinone progesterone pessaries each day. I have to take my crinone each evening until I'm 13 weeks and then every 2 evenings until I'm 14 weeks. By then the placenta will have taken over from the yolk sack and my body will no longer need the extra progesterone. Much as it puts my mind at rest taking it at the moment, I'll be pleased to stop as it is a little yucky!!
Wish me luck for Tuesday x
I feel very fortunate to have just written the above sentence as my twitter feed is currently littered with a lot of BFNs, news of miscarriage, girls not responding to IVF treatment and those waiting to start treatment. Pregnancy really is a blessing and does not always come easily.
Today Buzz, Posey and I are just chilling at home. It's the perfect family Sunday really as the weather is lovely and we can use the garden. We have all the patio doors open at the back of the house so we can just potter around!
Tuesday is a big day as that's when Buzz and I have our 12 week scan to confirm dates and ensure the baby is developing correctly, I have no reason to believe things aren't as they should be but naturally there's fear in my mind that something might not be right. I have lots of things to keep me busy until Tuesday and then our scan is at 8.50am so will be here before I know it hopefully.
Tuesday is also Posey's first day at preschool. She's now 23 months and is graduating from nursery to preschool at her current school. She has to wear a uniform from now on! Scary stuff! Hopefully she'll settle in well. Lots of her friends are moving with her so she'll be with familiar faces.
I had to start taking Pregaday iron tablets this week as my iron levels were low. I had been feeling very very tired and a little dizzy from time to time and now I feel much less so, so hopefully they ,ve made a good difference. I have to take them until the baby arrives.
I'm also still taking my pregnacare supplements daily as well as my crinone progesterone pessaries each day. I have to take my crinone each evening until I'm 13 weeks and then every 2 evenings until I'm 14 weeks. By then the placenta will have taken over from the yolk sack and my body will no longer need the extra progesterone. Much as it puts my mind at rest taking it at the moment, I'll be pleased to stop as it is a little yucky!!
Wish me luck for Tuesday x
Sunday 14 July 2013
11 weeks pregnant :)
Hurray hurray, just one more week until 'ok'! In theory....
I think you read a lot about how the first 12 weeks of pregnancy are the most critical and then after that, coupled with your 12 week scan, the risk of miscarriage reduces dramatically and it's kind of ok to start announcing your pregnancy to friends and colleagues.
Buzz and I announced my pregnancy with Posey when I was around 13 weeks and we'd had the results of our nuchal fold scan back, which gave us a low risk of Down's syndrome and other chromosomal abnormalities. I already had a bit of a bump, and we felt we'd waited so long that it was finally OUR turn to announce our pregnancy. What an amzing feeling that was!
On my 12 week scan I will actually be 12+2 and we will have our nuchal fold scan that day too. I have a bump already! I'm naturally somewhere between a size 6-8 so being petite, my bump is quite obvious. I've been hiding it with skinny jeans and loose fitting tops. I'm looking forward to not having to do that for much longer!
Buzz and I have decided that we'll wait until we have our nuchal fold scan results again before we announce our current pregnancy. I imagine I'll be somewhere between 13-14 weeks by then so going into my second trimester.
So how am I feeling just now?
Bit mixed tbh. At my booking appt when I was 9+3 they did standard blood tests and yesterday I received a letter in the post advising me to collect sme iron tablets from my maternity unit as I'm anaemic. I felt like crying, like I'd let us down. I took iron supplements through my pregnancy with Posey but not until around 20 weeks. I've been feeling pretty exhausted again over the last 2 weeks and a little dizzy from time to time, so I guess that's explained by my iron deficiency. I'm vegetarian, so although I take my pregnacare supplements, of course I don't get iron through meat. While pregnant with Posey, I had regular nosebleeds too, and I had one 2 days ago, so perhaps they're going to feature in this pregnancy too!
Apart from that & some bloating (which I'm blaming on my crinone progesterone supplements) I'm ok! Enjoying being pregnant! Definitely looking forward to our 12 week scan next week too.
x
I think you read a lot about how the first 12 weeks of pregnancy are the most critical and then after that, coupled with your 12 week scan, the risk of miscarriage reduces dramatically and it's kind of ok to start announcing your pregnancy to friends and colleagues.
Buzz and I announced my pregnancy with Posey when I was around 13 weeks and we'd had the results of our nuchal fold scan back, which gave us a low risk of Down's syndrome and other chromosomal abnormalities. I already had a bit of a bump, and we felt we'd waited so long that it was finally OUR turn to announce our pregnancy. What an amzing feeling that was!
On my 12 week scan I will actually be 12+2 and we will have our nuchal fold scan that day too. I have a bump already! I'm naturally somewhere between a size 6-8 so being petite, my bump is quite obvious. I've been hiding it with skinny jeans and loose fitting tops. I'm looking forward to not having to do that for much longer!
Buzz and I have decided that we'll wait until we have our nuchal fold scan results again before we announce our current pregnancy. I imagine I'll be somewhere between 13-14 weeks by then so going into my second trimester.
So how am I feeling just now?
Bit mixed tbh. At my booking appt when I was 9+3 they did standard blood tests and yesterday I received a letter in the post advising me to collect sme iron tablets from my maternity unit as I'm anaemic. I felt like crying, like I'd let us down. I took iron supplements through my pregnancy with Posey but not until around 20 weeks. I've been feeling pretty exhausted again over the last 2 weeks and a little dizzy from time to time, so I guess that's explained by my iron deficiency. I'm vegetarian, so although I take my pregnacare supplements, of course I don't get iron through meat. While pregnant with Posey, I had regular nosebleeds too, and I had one 2 days ago, so perhaps they're going to feature in this pregnancy too!
Apart from that & some bloating (which I'm blaming on my crinone progesterone supplements) I'm ok! Enjoying being pregnant! Definitely looking forward to our 12 week scan next week too.
x
Sunday 7 July 2013
10 weeks pregnant :)
Yay! So today is officially the day when our embryo turns into a foetus! We're also 25% of the way through my pregnancy. How time flies.
I'm feeling pretty good just now. I'm exhausted by 9.30pm but I have my energy back during the day and my nausea seems to have passed. Hopefully it'll stay that way. I've been enjoying lots of time outside with Posey in the sunshine over the last week but I'm having to wear as high a factor as her as my skin seems very sensitive to the sun. I'm drinking loads and loads of water too to keep me hydrated.
Buzz and I went to our booking appointment this week too. It was all fairly straightforward but the hospital have put me under consultant care this time rather than sole midwife-care as Posey arrived prematurely. I feel ok about it as I am terrified this baby will arrive early too, so the more care I get, the better.
My 12 week scan is booked for 23 July, which is a little over 2 weeks away. I'll be 12+2 that day. As I'll be 36 when the new baby arrives we have opted to have the nuchal fold scan as well as the dating scan. The nuchal fold scan assesses the likelihood of our baby having downs syndrome as well as other chromosome-related conditions. We had the nuchal fold scan when I was pregnant with Posey too and the odds came back as a 55,000:1 chance of her having a condition, which was considered very low risk.
So for the next 2 weeks I will continue to look after myself and enjoy my pregnancy. I'm eating well, sleeping well and feeling pretty ok. I feel fortunate, very fortunate. Buzz, Posey and I are off to Norfolk for a little holiday tomorrow to recharge our batteries. The weather is forecast to be lovely and sunny all week!
x
I'm feeling pretty good just now. I'm exhausted by 9.30pm but I have my energy back during the day and my nausea seems to have passed. Hopefully it'll stay that way. I've been enjoying lots of time outside with Posey in the sunshine over the last week but I'm having to wear as high a factor as her as my skin seems very sensitive to the sun. I'm drinking loads and loads of water too to keep me hydrated.
Buzz and I went to our booking appointment this week too. It was all fairly straightforward but the hospital have put me under consultant care this time rather than sole midwife-care as Posey arrived prematurely. I feel ok about it as I am terrified this baby will arrive early too, so the more care I get, the better.
My 12 week scan is booked for 23 July, which is a little over 2 weeks away. I'll be 12+2 that day. As I'll be 36 when the new baby arrives we have opted to have the nuchal fold scan as well as the dating scan. The nuchal fold scan assesses the likelihood of our baby having downs syndrome as well as other chromosome-related conditions. We had the nuchal fold scan when I was pregnant with Posey too and the odds came back as a 55,000:1 chance of her having a condition, which was considered very low risk.
So for the next 2 weeks I will continue to look after myself and enjoy my pregnancy. I'm eating well, sleeping well and feeling pretty ok. I feel fortunate, very fortunate. Buzz, Posey and I are off to Norfolk for a little holiday tomorrow to recharge our batteries. The weather is forecast to be lovely and sunny all week!
x
Monday 1 July 2013
9 weeks pregnant and loving it x
Hurray hurray! The nausea and tiredness seem to have passed (for now..) and I'm feeling pretty good. Today I am 9 weeks and 1 day pregnant with my second baby. The 2 weeks since my viability scan seem to have flown by and I'm looking forward to the weeks ahead. Buzz, Posey and I have a lot to look forward to.
Our booking appointment is in 2 days time. This will be the first time we've seen a midwife this pregnancy. The booking appointment is to confirm my pregnancy dates details, talk through my health and my previous pregnancy so we can plan the care I'll receive during this pregnancy. Given Posey was a preemie I'm keen to keep my community midwife close. The booking appointment feels like yet another milestone and I felt quite emotional when I received the letter with our appointment.
Next week the 3 of us are heading to a holiday cottage in Suffolk for 5 days. We're really looking forward to it as the last few months have been tough at times. It's only about 90 mins drive from us so perfect for Posey to have her nap in the car!
I am also looking forward to launching my third business venture on our return from holiday. I've worked really hard on it and am proud of it.
It's Posey's birthday soon too so Buzz and I have been busy planning her party! Very exciting but I can't quite believe she's about to turn 2. Time flies way too fast!
x
Our booking appointment is in 2 days time. This will be the first time we've seen a midwife this pregnancy. The booking appointment is to confirm my pregnancy dates details, talk through my health and my previous pregnancy so we can plan the care I'll receive during this pregnancy. Given Posey was a preemie I'm keen to keep my community midwife close. The booking appointment feels like yet another milestone and I felt quite emotional when I received the letter with our appointment.
Next week the 3 of us are heading to a holiday cottage in Suffolk for 5 days. We're really looking forward to it as the last few months have been tough at times. It's only about 90 mins drive from us so perfect for Posey to have her nap in the car!
I am also looking forward to launching my third business venture on our return from holiday. I've worked really hard on it and am proud of it.
It's Posey's birthday soon too so Buzz and I have been busy planning her party! Very exciting but I can't quite believe she's about to turn 2. Time flies way too fast!
x
Saturday 22 June 2013
My first trimester so far
Today I am 7 weeks and 5 days pregnant. Monday almost feels magical as it'll be classed as the 2 month point - exciting!!
Given Posey arrived just short of the 8 month mark, I could be a quarter of the way through my pregnancy already! I think up until Tuesday of this week I spent most of my time being worried. Firstly about whether my IVF with ICSI treatment was going to be successful, and then being concerned about my viability scan. Now that I know my pregnancy is developing well I feel much more relaxed and able to start chilling and relaxing more. I really really want the crucial 12 week mark to arrive though. Last time that was when I felt able to really chill out!
So how am I feeling?
We'll start with the bad and then get better...
1. Run down.
Yesterday I came down with a nasty, stuffy head cold. I finally slept from 4am-8am and then 10am-12.30pm. I felt so rough overnight and was in and out of bed all night :( Today has been spent lolling in my leggings and getting through a ton of lockets and balsam tissues. Hopefully tonight and tomorrow I'll feel better. I kind of feel like now 'i know things are ok' my body has relaxed a little and therefore succumbed to some pesky germs....
2. Cravings.
I'm probably a fussy eater at the best of times but the last few weeks have set me into a league of my own! It's a good job I am flexible with when I work as I can just pop to our local Waitrose and get whatever I fancy. 2 weeks ago I was all about pesto pasta with mushrooms. Now I feel sick at the thought of it and can't get enough of Quorn cottage pie and cheese & onion crisps!
3. Nausea & extreme tiredness.
Fortunately I've only had this on and off so far but when I have felt nauseus it's always been linked to me being over-tired. On the ads Posey is at home with me I nap when she does and on other days I literally sleep when I feel the need to. I'm lucky I can get plenty of rest really. My dream genii pregnancy pillow has made sleeping much more comfortable too, especially when I'm in and out of bed for wees and drinks all night!
4. The elation at being pregnant again. I feel fortunate, blessed, so so happy. I love being a mum and that feeling just overwhelms me every day.
x
Given Posey arrived just short of the 8 month mark, I could be a quarter of the way through my pregnancy already! I think up until Tuesday of this week I spent most of my time being worried. Firstly about whether my IVF with ICSI treatment was going to be successful, and then being concerned about my viability scan. Now that I know my pregnancy is developing well I feel much more relaxed and able to start chilling and relaxing more. I really really want the crucial 12 week mark to arrive though. Last time that was when I felt able to really chill out!
So how am I feeling?
We'll start with the bad and then get better...
1. Run down.
Yesterday I came down with a nasty, stuffy head cold. I finally slept from 4am-8am and then 10am-12.30pm. I felt so rough overnight and was in and out of bed all night :( Today has been spent lolling in my leggings and getting through a ton of lockets and balsam tissues. Hopefully tonight and tomorrow I'll feel better. I kind of feel like now 'i know things are ok' my body has relaxed a little and therefore succumbed to some pesky germs....
2. Cravings.
I'm probably a fussy eater at the best of times but the last few weeks have set me into a league of my own! It's a good job I am flexible with when I work as I can just pop to our local Waitrose and get whatever I fancy. 2 weeks ago I was all about pesto pasta with mushrooms. Now I feel sick at the thought of it and can't get enough of Quorn cottage pie and cheese & onion crisps!
3. Nausea & extreme tiredness.
Fortunately I've only had this on and off so far but when I have felt nauseus it's always been linked to me being over-tired. On the ads Posey is at home with me I nap when she does and on other days I literally sleep when I feel the need to. I'm lucky I can get plenty of rest really. My dream genii pregnancy pillow has made sleeping much more comfortable too, especially when I'm in and out of bed for wees and drinks all night!
4. The elation at being pregnant again. I feel fortunate, blessed, so so happy. I love being a mum and that feeling just overwhelms me every day.
x
Wednesday 19 June 2013
My 7 week viability scan
Phew! So yesterday afternoon was our 7 week viability scan and Buzz & I went off to the clinic. We were both pretty nervous....but it was fine!
We feel like the most fortunate couple in the world. Firstly, to have Posey, and secondly for me to now be 7 weeks and 2 days pregnant with Coco no.2 :). Words cannot express our happiness.
Within seconds of 'dildo cam' being employed the nurse said she could see the foetus, the yolk sack and a little flashing light, which was just amazing. The flashing light was the heartbeat, and it was so so good to see. She measured the foetus at 11.1mm, which is the equivalent of 7 weeks 2 days gestation, perfect! The foetus has embedded in my womb nicely too, so no worries about an ectopic pregnancy. We were in and out with big smiles on our faces within 20 minutes and a lovely picture of Coco jnr. Such an amazing feeling and although it's still very early days in my pregnancy, I feel much more relaxed than I did yesterday.
This morning I saw my GP, who was over the moon for me. He has booked me onto antenatal care and my first appointment with a midwife will be in around 3 weeks time. It's called the 'booking appointment' where the midwife checks all your details, gives you your file of notes and discusses your health and any previous pregnancies. Normally on second and subsequent pregnancies midwife check ups are planned less frequently but given Posey was born prematurely I'd like the same care, if not more from 30 weeks onwards, so I will mention that.
So, now I need to keep looking after myself! I will go on this afternoon with a bowl of grapes in the garden and an evening in front of the TV...oh, and I may browse the maternity ranges at Topshop.com and ASOS :)
x
We feel like the most fortunate couple in the world. Firstly, to have Posey, and secondly for me to now be 7 weeks and 2 days pregnant with Coco no.2 :). Words cannot express our happiness.
Within seconds of 'dildo cam' being employed the nurse said she could see the foetus, the yolk sack and a little flashing light, which was just amazing. The flashing light was the heartbeat, and it was so so good to see. She measured the foetus at 11.1mm, which is the equivalent of 7 weeks 2 days gestation, perfect! The foetus has embedded in my womb nicely too, so no worries about an ectopic pregnancy. We were in and out with big smiles on our faces within 20 minutes and a lovely picture of Coco jnr. Such an amazing feeling and although it's still very early days in my pregnancy, I feel much more relaxed than I did yesterday.
This morning I saw my GP, who was over the moon for me. He has booked me onto antenatal care and my first appointment with a midwife will be in around 3 weeks time. It's called the 'booking appointment' where the midwife checks all your details, gives you your file of notes and discusses your health and any previous pregnancies. Normally on second and subsequent pregnancies midwife check ups are planned less frequently but given Posey was born prematurely I'd like the same care, if not more from 30 weeks onwards, so I will mention that.
So, now I need to keep looking after myself! I will go on this afternoon with a bowl of grapes in the garden and an evening in front of the TV...oh, and I may browse the maternity ranges at Topshop.com and ASOS :)
x
Tuesday 18 June 2013
7 weeks 3 days pregnant. My viability scan day..
I really don't like to call it a 'viability' scan but that seems to be what it's known as. At around 7 weeks of pregnancy the clinic expect to see that the foetus has a heartbeat. They also check that you are not having an ectopic pregnancy, how many babies there are in there and that said babies are measuring correctly versus gestation. The clinic also check that you are producing enough progesterone to support the yolk sack carrying the baby until the placenta takes over at around 12 weeks.
I have my viability scan this afternoon and boy am I nervous! I feel excited too that I will see my little blueberry on the screen with a little flashing heartbeat but terrified in case something isn't as it should be. I guess feeling like that is totally natural, especially after experiencing IVF to fall pregnant.
At my viability scan with Posey I heard the words "we have a pregnancy! Don't plan too much for the end of September will you!" Oh how I long to hear those words again. I really hope my nausea, sore boobs, extreme tiredness and bloating means everything is happening as it's meant to.
Wish me luck!
x
I have my viability scan this afternoon and boy am I nervous! I feel excited too that I will see my little blueberry on the screen with a little flashing heartbeat but terrified in case something isn't as it should be. I guess feeling like that is totally natural, especially after experiencing IVF to fall pregnant.
At my viability scan with Posey I heard the words "we have a pregnancy! Don't plan too much for the end of September will you!" Oh how I long to hear those words again. I really hope my nausea, sore boobs, extreme tiredness and bloating means everything is happening as it's meant to.
Wish me luck!
x
Wednesday 12 June 2013
'Baby Brain' My theory...!
A lot of mums (and dads) I know joke about 'baby brain' (BB) and how their memories and abilities to do certain things just aren't as good as before they became parents. I have to include myself in this as these days I rely on many little to do lists - on paper, in my iPhone, on the calendar, etc etc. some days if I don't write it down I'll forget it even happened!
So why do we fall victim to baby brain? I'll give you my theory....
1. Before I fell pregnany with Posey I only really had myself to think about. I could get up at the last minute and race to get ready for work, focus on work all day and then do as I pleased in the evenings. Some nights I'd see my personal trainer, or I'd do a Pilates class or I might go and meet some friends after work for dinner. I could be flexible. My agenda was only mine. Buzz did the same. We didn't know how much flexibility we had! Now I still want to do all those things but my mind is on Posey all the time. If she's at home I'm planning trips out, entertainment in the house, her meals and making sure she's happy. If she's at nursery I'm thinking about what she's up to, who she's playing with, what she's had to eat, how many hours until I collect her. She is my world and whatever else I'm trying to do, thinking about her takes over.
2. Looking after children can be unpredictable. Posey loves a trip to the shops and is usually happy to sit in her pushchair or be on little life rucksack with reins. However sometimes we have to stop what we're doing and go to the park or the library so she can do what she wants to do for a while before we carry on. She's not yet 2 so she doesn't yet understand that sometimes you have to put up & shut up! I've always been quite an organised person and when I need to do something I like to focus on that thing like I'm on a mission! Breaking off to do something else throws me and I can't remember what I was in the middle of doing!
3. Hormones! I know many girls who have been through fertility treatment will agree with me when I say the hormone surges that you experience whie having treatment are immense and at times are very difficult to understand and cope with. Likewise, through pregnancy your body goes through a lot of hormonal changes and that can do strange things to you - mood swings, hot flushes, tiredness, tearyness etc etc. Not easy to manage and those things can overpower you, making your day to day life harder than usual.
That's my baby brain theory in a nutshell! Tell me your thoughts on it too.
x
So why do we fall victim to baby brain? I'll give you my theory....
1. Before I fell pregnany with Posey I only really had myself to think about. I could get up at the last minute and race to get ready for work, focus on work all day and then do as I pleased in the evenings. Some nights I'd see my personal trainer, or I'd do a Pilates class or I might go and meet some friends after work for dinner. I could be flexible. My agenda was only mine. Buzz did the same. We didn't know how much flexibility we had! Now I still want to do all those things but my mind is on Posey all the time. If she's at home I'm planning trips out, entertainment in the house, her meals and making sure she's happy. If she's at nursery I'm thinking about what she's up to, who she's playing with, what she's had to eat, how many hours until I collect her. She is my world and whatever else I'm trying to do, thinking about her takes over.
2. Looking after children can be unpredictable. Posey loves a trip to the shops and is usually happy to sit in her pushchair or be on little life rucksack with reins. However sometimes we have to stop what we're doing and go to the park or the library so she can do what she wants to do for a while before we carry on. She's not yet 2 so she doesn't yet understand that sometimes you have to put up & shut up! I've always been quite an organised person and when I need to do something I like to focus on that thing like I'm on a mission! Breaking off to do something else throws me and I can't remember what I was in the middle of doing!
3. Hormones! I know many girls who have been through fertility treatment will agree with me when I say the hormone surges that you experience whie having treatment are immense and at times are very difficult to understand and cope with. Likewise, through pregnancy your body goes through a lot of hormonal changes and that can do strange things to you - mood swings, hot flushes, tiredness, tearyness etc etc. Not easy to manage and those things can overpower you, making your day to day life harder than usual.
That's my baby brain theory in a nutshell! Tell me your thoughts on it too.
x
Monday 10 June 2013
6 weeks pregnant!
Today I am 6 weeks pregnant. I still find saying that quite overwhelming and have to pinch myself to realise it's true!
How am I feeling?
Pretty exhausted to tell the truth. It seems most hrs find the tiredness of the first trimester hard to cope with. Your body goes through so many changes and your hormones go off the scale! During my first trimester with Posey I was working full time and used to get home and just zonk on the sofa. This time thankfully I don't have work to contend with (as I pick & choose my work) but of course I have Posey to run around after. Not easy! I often take a lunchtime nap while she naps and I tend to be in bed by 9.30pm. I have to look after myself and conserve my energy!
I've only had 1 day of nausea so far (I had none with Posey) but I think that day may have been down to tiredness more than anything. I've had cravings for salt. Things like salty chips, crisps and peanuts! I've also been trying to keep my iron levels up by eating lts of green veg (I'm vegetarian so no meat or fish for me!)
I feel quite anxious still as it's such early days in my pregnancy but I also feel a little excited. I think about things like turning our 4th bedroom into a nursery, testing out double pushchairs, finding out if we're having a boy or a girl, being able to properly announce we're expecting again and having a baby bump!!
I have a viability scan on Tue 18 June so until then I'm trying not to let my mind run away with itself. I have no reason to suspect anything is wrong though so I will keep thinking +ve and hopefully the next week will go quickly.
x
How am I feeling?
Pretty exhausted to tell the truth. It seems most hrs find the tiredness of the first trimester hard to cope with. Your body goes through so many changes and your hormones go off the scale! During my first trimester with Posey I was working full time and used to get home and just zonk on the sofa. This time thankfully I don't have work to contend with (as I pick & choose my work) but of course I have Posey to run around after. Not easy! I often take a lunchtime nap while she naps and I tend to be in bed by 9.30pm. I have to look after myself and conserve my energy!
I've only had 1 day of nausea so far (I had none with Posey) but I think that day may have been down to tiredness more than anything. I've had cravings for salt. Things like salty chips, crisps and peanuts! I've also been trying to keep my iron levels up by eating lts of green veg (I'm vegetarian so no meat or fish for me!)
I feel quite anxious still as it's such early days in my pregnancy but I also feel a little excited. I think about things like turning our 4th bedroom into a nursery, testing out double pushchairs, finding out if we're having a boy or a girl, being able to properly announce we're expecting again and having a baby bump!!
I have a viability scan on Tue 18 June so until then I'm trying not to let my mind run away with itself. I have no reason to suspect anything is wrong though so I will keep thinking +ve and hopefully the next week will go quickly.
x
Wednesday 5 June 2013
Looking after yourself during the first trimester
I thought I'd write a blog about how to care for ourself during the first trimester of pregnancy. I must admit, I found it easier when I was pregnant with Posey, but then I only had myself to think about and I was 2.5 years younger!
Nutrition:
Experts recommend that you take a folic acid supplement each day while you are trying to conceive and for the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. Folic acid helps the baby to develop normally and also encourages the prevention of conditions such as spina bifida. As i'm vegetarian, I am aso taking an omega 3 supplement, to help with the baby's brain development. Sanatogen do a 'mother to be' supplement which has both (see below). You can take it right through your pregnancy.
It's also more important than ever to eat a balanced diet. My appetite has definitely increased! I certainly eat my 5 fruit and veg a day but this time it tends to be whatever Posey is having rather than what I fancy! She loves cucumber, strawberries, raspberries, raisins, bananas and Ella's Kitchen fruit pouches. I also make a lot of smothers from scratch. My favourite is natural yoghurt / blueberries / raspberries / banana / milk.
I'm eating lots of omelettes to so am getting plenty of protein from the eggs and I'm putting plenty of veg and cheese into them. Anther favourite of mine is roasted vegetables - great for an iron hit! I roast new potatoes, leeks, peppers, aubergine, courgettes, butternut squash and red onions with olive oil and rosemary - yum!!
Other favourite meals of mine are stir frys and jacket potatoes with salad. Very easy to prepare.
I've been craving milk since I fell pregnant too. It was the same during my pregnancy with Posey too.
Sleep:
Some days I am exhausted! Other days I am fine. When I was pregnant with Posey some nights I would sleep from 9-7 (with loo breaks..) whereas this time I try and have some quality time with Buzz in the evening after Posey had gone to bed at 7. She's getting up at around 6.30am at the moment so I have to be up & raring to go by then. She still sleeps for around 2 hours each lunchtime, so if I feel like I need it I nap at the same time as her to recharge my batteries.
Nausea:
I had nothing whatsoever with Posey. For this pregnancy so far I have had 1 day. I hope that's all! I feel fortunate to have felt ok as far as sickness goes.
Listen to your body:
I'm a firm believer that during pregnancy you should listen to your body and follow your instincts. Sleep when you need to, eat when you need to and just stop if you feel tired of doing something. It's hard work baking a baby! The Internet is a wealth of advice (some more useful than others..) and I find babycentre.co.uk to be really useful. I have also been fortunate with community midwives. There are always numbers you can call if you need reassurance.
Emotions:
There have been tears, tiredness, irrational ideas, over thinking basic things and grumpiness so far. Buzz is putting up with a lot!
Being active for your kids:
I have Posey and she is 21mths old. For 12 hours a day (minus a 2hr nap) she runs everywhere. She is unstoppable! She loves the park, books, our garden, the shops and cbeebies! She wants me to do everything with her and I want to do everything with her. It's for that reason that I will do everything to keep myself in tip top shape. She's my little angel.
X
Nutrition:
Experts recommend that you take a folic acid supplement each day while you are trying to conceive and for the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. Folic acid helps the baby to develop normally and also encourages the prevention of conditions such as spina bifida. As i'm vegetarian, I am aso taking an omega 3 supplement, to help with the baby's brain development. Sanatogen do a 'mother to be' supplement which has both (see below). You can take it right through your pregnancy.
It's also more important than ever to eat a balanced diet. My appetite has definitely increased! I certainly eat my 5 fruit and veg a day but this time it tends to be whatever Posey is having rather than what I fancy! She loves cucumber, strawberries, raspberries, raisins, bananas and Ella's Kitchen fruit pouches. I also make a lot of smothers from scratch. My favourite is natural yoghurt / blueberries / raspberries / banana / milk.
I'm eating lots of omelettes to so am getting plenty of protein from the eggs and I'm putting plenty of veg and cheese into them. Anther favourite of mine is roasted vegetables - great for an iron hit! I roast new potatoes, leeks, peppers, aubergine, courgettes, butternut squash and red onions with olive oil and rosemary - yum!!
Other favourite meals of mine are stir frys and jacket potatoes with salad. Very easy to prepare.
I've been craving milk since I fell pregnant too. It was the same during my pregnancy with Posey too.
Sleep:
Some days I am exhausted! Other days I am fine. When I was pregnant with Posey some nights I would sleep from 9-7 (with loo breaks..) whereas this time I try and have some quality time with Buzz in the evening after Posey had gone to bed at 7. She's getting up at around 6.30am at the moment so I have to be up & raring to go by then. She still sleeps for around 2 hours each lunchtime, so if I feel like I need it I nap at the same time as her to recharge my batteries.
Nausea:
I had nothing whatsoever with Posey. For this pregnancy so far I have had 1 day. I hope that's all! I feel fortunate to have felt ok as far as sickness goes.
Listen to your body:
I'm a firm believer that during pregnancy you should listen to your body and follow your instincts. Sleep when you need to, eat when you need to and just stop if you feel tired of doing something. It's hard work baking a baby! The Internet is a wealth of advice (some more useful than others..) and I find babycentre.co.uk to be really useful. I have also been fortunate with community midwives. There are always numbers you can call if you need reassurance.
Emotions:
There have been tears, tiredness, irrational ideas, over thinking basic things and grumpiness so far. Buzz is putting up with a lot!
Being active for your kids:
I have Posey and she is 21mths old. For 12 hours a day (minus a 2hr nap) she runs everywhere. She is unstoppable! She loves the park, books, our garden, the shops and cbeebies! She wants me to do everything with her and I want to do everything with her. It's for that reason that I will do everything to keep myself in tip top shape. She's my little angel.
X
Tuesday 4 June 2013
5 weeks 2 days pregnant....baby brain?!
I'm into week 6 now of baking a new baby Coco and wow, I feel fortunate. I feel truly blessed.
I also feel pretty un-energetic, hungry all the time, uncomfortable from the yucky crinone and a bit fat. I can more than cope with all this though, as I am now just 2 weeks off my viability scan. It is a week since Buzz and I found out our IVF with ICSI treatment had been successful.
I am currently sitting in my garden 'working' while Posey is at nursery. I honestly have done some work today. I won't bore you with the details but I am setting up a new business venture and have been writing my website text today. The cats are in the garden with me, my guinea pig is watching the washing swinging away on the line and the rabbits are sunbathing!
I'm not sure at what point the dreaded 'baby brain' sets in during pregnancy, and even if it ever goes away after the baby is born to be honest but I must admit I do feel really forgetful right now. If I don't write something down it didn't happen. I have been like this since i was just a few months pregnant with Posey. I have decided to put this down to the fact I can no longer just think about myself, my agenda and what I'm doing. My life and time are taken up with thinking about Posey and baby Coco every second of the day. If Posey is at nursery I wonder what she's up to, what she's eating, what she's playing with, what new words she's learnt and how many times she's said "Mummy". Now I also continually wonder if baby coco will be a boy or girl, how he/she and Posey will grow up together and how lovely it will be to have a newborn again. Right now I don't let myself think past that point as I am only 5 weeks pregnant so there is a long long way to go. I must think positively though.
And as for the baby brain, well, I think it's here forever!!!
x
I also feel pretty un-energetic, hungry all the time, uncomfortable from the yucky crinone and a bit fat. I can more than cope with all this though, as I am now just 2 weeks off my viability scan. It is a week since Buzz and I found out our IVF with ICSI treatment had been successful.
I am currently sitting in my garden 'working' while Posey is at nursery. I honestly have done some work today. I won't bore you with the details but I am setting up a new business venture and have been writing my website text today. The cats are in the garden with me, my guinea pig is watching the washing swinging away on the line and the rabbits are sunbathing!
I'm not sure at what point the dreaded 'baby brain' sets in during pregnancy, and even if it ever goes away after the baby is born to be honest but I must admit I do feel really forgetful right now. If I don't write something down it didn't happen. I have been like this since i was just a few months pregnant with Posey. I have decided to put this down to the fact I can no longer just think about myself, my agenda and what I'm doing. My life and time are taken up with thinking about Posey and baby Coco every second of the day. If Posey is at nursery I wonder what she's up to, what she's eating, what she's playing with, what new words she's learnt and how many times she's said "Mummy". Now I also continually wonder if baby coco will be a boy or girl, how he/she and Posey will grow up together and how lovely it will be to have a newborn again. Right now I don't let myself think past that point as I am only 5 weeks pregnant so there is a long long way to go. I must think positively though.
And as for the baby brain, well, I think it's here forever!!!
x
Saturday 1 June 2013
Looking after a 1 year old while pregnant!
I thought I'd write this post as ths week I have found myself in the incredibly fortunate position where I have a 1 year old and I'm also a month pregnant again!
Posey will be 2 towards the end of August. She's a typical 1 year old moving fast towards the terrible twos...she's full of energy because she sleeps well (always), eats well (most of the time) and we do lots of activities together - dancing, singing, reading, the park, the garden, playing with our pets, days out etc etc. In the last month or two her vocabulary has developed loads and she repeats most words Buzz and I say now. I could compare it to having a parrot (!), it really is just like having a mini-me. She knows what she wants and when she she wants it. She may not know all the words to tell me just yet but she sure knows how to grab my hand and take me to what she wants!!
I guess what I'm saying is she's not a baby anymore. I'm really looking forward to the next 8 months or so of having her as my little friend while I bake her little brother or sister. It feels like the timing is just right for us all.
As I type, I am sitting at the breakfast bar with a cup of tea and my iPad. Until a minute ago Pisey was playing with the contents of one of our kitchen drawers. She had tea towels, plastic bowls, plates and bibs out. Of course she got bored pretty quickly so is now sitting on a barstool next to me examining the contents of the fruit bowl. So far I have heard "nana", "appe" and "boo". These mean banana, apple and bowl!! She decided she wanted a banana too so we're currently sharing one.
It's lovely that we share so much now and I really hope when the new baby is here she stays just as fun, giggly and keen to explore everything. I will have to ensure I give her loads of time and attention.
How do I feel just now? Tired in all honesty. Buzz got up early with her today at 6.10am and I lay in until 8am. I needed to catch up! Hopefully we can carry on dividing and conquering so Buzz and I both get enough rest over the coming months with him working hard and me looking after Posey and running our businesses!
Life is good, I'm extremely lucky,
x
Posey will be 2 towards the end of August. She's a typical 1 year old moving fast towards the terrible twos...she's full of energy because she sleeps well (always), eats well (most of the time) and we do lots of activities together - dancing, singing, reading, the park, the garden, playing with our pets, days out etc etc. In the last month or two her vocabulary has developed loads and she repeats most words Buzz and I say now. I could compare it to having a parrot (!), it really is just like having a mini-me. She knows what she wants and when she she wants it. She may not know all the words to tell me just yet but she sure knows how to grab my hand and take me to what she wants!!
I guess what I'm saying is she's not a baby anymore. I'm really looking forward to the next 8 months or so of having her as my little friend while I bake her little brother or sister. It feels like the timing is just right for us all.
As I type, I am sitting at the breakfast bar with a cup of tea and my iPad. Until a minute ago Pisey was playing with the contents of one of our kitchen drawers. She had tea towels, plastic bowls, plates and bibs out. Of course she got bored pretty quickly so is now sitting on a barstool next to me examining the contents of the fruit bowl. So far I have heard "nana", "appe" and "boo". These mean banana, apple and bowl!! She decided she wanted a banana too so we're currently sharing one.
It's lovely that we share so much now and I really hope when the new baby is here she stays just as fun, giggly and keen to explore everything. I will have to ensure I give her loads of time and attention.
How do I feel just now? Tired in all honesty. Buzz got up early with her today at 6.10am and I lay in until 8am. I needed to catch up! Hopefully we can carry on dividing and conquering so Buzz and I both get enough rest over the coming months with him working hard and me looking after Posey and running our businesses!
Life is good, I'm extremely lucky,
x
Thursday 30 May 2013
4 wks 3 days pregnant and feeling pretty rotten
I guess the title of this post doesn't really explain how I feel but let me elaborate....there are 3 feelings on my mind today:
1. I am exhausted. I've not been sleeping great at night this week and Posey has been waking up early. She only naps for 2 hours at the most at lunchtime and by the time I've settled down for some rest she's up! I can't get comfy at night so today I will buy a Dream Genii pillow. I had one last time I was pregnant and it really helped me to get comfy and sleep :). I also feel pretty nauseous and just 'not with it.' I can't wait for the weekend when Buzz will be here and I can get some more downtime.
2. Despite feeling like 1. I am elated. I still feel like the luckiest girl alive. No amount of sickness, tiredness or grumpiness will stop me feeling like this.
3. I'm scared. Really scared. What of? Well I'm scared of not actually being pregnant. What if my BETA test results were wrong and there was too much HCG left in my system after my pre egg collection trigger shot? I'm 99.9% sure I'm being silly even thinking this but I can't help it. I think until I see my scan on 18 June I'm going to have this at the back of my mind. I feel more so like this today because one of my fellow IVF tweeters had 2 positive HPTs yesterday and the day before (her official test date was yesterday) and then has had a BFN today. I really feel for her. Her clinic won't do a BETA for her either. What a horrid situation after such a long journey. My heart goes out to her.
To help try and put my mind at ease this afternoon I've decided to buy some HPTs of my own. I did it when I was in the very early days of pregnancy with posey too and did a test every few days. I think it helped my mind running away with itself.
x
1. I am exhausted. I've not been sleeping great at night this week and Posey has been waking up early. She only naps for 2 hours at the most at lunchtime and by the time I've settled down for some rest she's up! I can't get comfy at night so today I will buy a Dream Genii pillow. I had one last time I was pregnant and it really helped me to get comfy and sleep :). I also feel pretty nauseous and just 'not with it.' I can't wait for the weekend when Buzz will be here and I can get some more downtime.
2. Despite feeling like 1. I am elated. I still feel like the luckiest girl alive. No amount of sickness, tiredness or grumpiness will stop me feeling like this.
3. I'm scared. Really scared. What of? Well I'm scared of not actually being pregnant. What if my BETA test results were wrong and there was too much HCG left in my system after my pre egg collection trigger shot? I'm 99.9% sure I'm being silly even thinking this but I can't help it. I think until I see my scan on 18 June I'm going to have this at the back of my mind. I feel more so like this today because one of my fellow IVF tweeters had 2 positive HPTs yesterday and the day before (her official test date was yesterday) and then has had a BFN today. I really feel for her. Her clinic won't do a BETA for her either. What a horrid situation after such a long journey. My heart goes out to her.
To help try and put my mind at ease this afternoon I've decided to buy some HPTs of my own. I did it when I was in the very early days of pregnancy with posey too and did a test every few days. I think it helped my mind running away with itself.
x
Wednesday 29 May 2013
4 weeks and 2 days pregnant. Oh, and delighted!
I can honestly say I am the happiest girl in the world.
Yes, I have struggled over the years to conceive. Yes, I have been through the pain of hearing many, many friends and colleagues announce their happy news. Yes, I have also held the tears back on many occasions when I've had infertility tests and scans. At times I felt I had no dignity. I knew I'd be a good mum, Buzz would be a good dad and that we could provide everything for a big family. There were many times though when I just thought it was never going to be for us and that we should just up sticks and move to Dubai.
After 3.5 years of TTC in January 2011 I fell pregnant with Posey on my first IVF cycle. I was stunned. Nothing will ever match the pure elation I felt.
Yesterday I found out I was pregnant having conceived via IVF with ICSI this month. Our first try at conceiving since Posey was born (obv we've tried the natural way since she was about 3 months old too!)
When you've been through coping with infertility and the horrible pressure and emotions that come with it you really don't take a second for granted. I feel incredibly fortunate to be experiencing my second miracle. During my 2ww I struggled to see how on earth, with the success odds, I could be so fortunate again.
On my twitter feeds and other blogs that I read I realise I have got off quite lightly in comparison to some girls. Many go through years and years of repeated IVF cycles, egg donation, sperm donation....the list is endless. As is the cost. I know a couple who remortgaged their house to fund their wish to start a family. My heart goes out to them. There still appears to be an imbalance of how many assisted-conception cycles you can receive depending on your postcode. Very harsh. Buzz and I had 3. We only needed 1 thankfully, but if we could have given away the other 2 to a opulent who needed it we absolutely would have done.
Of course it's very early days for my current pregnancy and I will be looking after myself 100% over the coming months. My next dream is to see a little heartbeat flickering away on my 18 June scan and for Posey to keep pointing at the baby in my tummy :)
x
Yes, I have struggled over the years to conceive. Yes, I have been through the pain of hearing many, many friends and colleagues announce their happy news. Yes, I have also held the tears back on many occasions when I've had infertility tests and scans. At times I felt I had no dignity. I knew I'd be a good mum, Buzz would be a good dad and that we could provide everything for a big family. There were many times though when I just thought it was never going to be for us and that we should just up sticks and move to Dubai.
After 3.5 years of TTC in January 2011 I fell pregnant with Posey on my first IVF cycle. I was stunned. Nothing will ever match the pure elation I felt.
Yesterday I found out I was pregnant having conceived via IVF with ICSI this month. Our first try at conceiving since Posey was born (obv we've tried the natural way since she was about 3 months old too!)
When you've been through coping with infertility and the horrible pressure and emotions that come with it you really don't take a second for granted. I feel incredibly fortunate to be experiencing my second miracle. During my 2ww I struggled to see how on earth, with the success odds, I could be so fortunate again.
On my twitter feeds and other blogs that I read I realise I have got off quite lightly in comparison to some girls. Many go through years and years of repeated IVF cycles, egg donation, sperm donation....the list is endless. As is the cost. I know a couple who remortgaged their house to fund their wish to start a family. My heart goes out to them. There still appears to be an imbalance of how many assisted-conception cycles you can receive depending on your postcode. Very harsh. Buzz and I had 3. We only needed 1 thankfully, but if we could have given away the other 2 to a opulent who needed it we absolutely would have done.
Of course it's very early days for my current pregnancy and I will be looking after myself 100% over the coming months. My next dream is to see a little heartbeat flickering away on my 18 June scan and for Posey to keep pointing at the baby in my tummy :)
x
Tuesday 28 May 2013
My BFP!!!
Wow, Buzz and I are stunned. We feel like the most fortunate couple in the world. The results of my pregnancy blood test came back within an hour this morning and showed that I am indeed PREGNANT!!!!
Buzz and I just looked at each other and both filled up. The relief and happiness we felt was just amazing. We feel so fortunate to have conceived on our first cycle with Posey and also to have conceived on this cycle.
The level of HCG in my blood test was 317. The nurse explained they look for anything above 50 as a positive result. She said 317 was very strong. That was such a nice thing to hear.
Have I cried with happiness yet? A little bit yes but I'm sure it will all come out once I'm chilled at home. I can't believe I'm 4 weeks pregnant!
What's next?
I'm booked in to have a viability scan at the clinic on day 35, which is 35 days after egg collection. It will happen on June 18th. We had a viability scan with Posey too. They do the scan at 35 days as by that point they can detect a heartbeat and also check to make sure the pregnancy isn't ectopic. With Posey, the 35 day scan was the point at which we felt like it was really happening. We saw a little coffee bean on the screen. It was an amazing moment and I cried with happiness. Roll on 18 June. I want that feeling again.
Tonight I will feel like the luckiest girl alive. I thought 1 miracle would be my lot but now I have another on the way. It's such early days and feels very frightening but I will look after myself well and take each day as it comes.
Thanks to everyone who has sent me messages of support,
x
Buzz and I just looked at each other and both filled up. The relief and happiness we felt was just amazing. We feel so fortunate to have conceived on our first cycle with Posey and also to have conceived on this cycle.
The level of HCG in my blood test was 317. The nurse explained they look for anything above 50 as a positive result. She said 317 was very strong. That was such a nice thing to hear.
Have I cried with happiness yet? A little bit yes but I'm sure it will all come out once I'm chilled at home. I can't believe I'm 4 weeks pregnant!
What's next?
I'm booked in to have a viability scan at the clinic on day 35, which is 35 days after egg collection. It will happen on June 18th. We had a viability scan with Posey too. They do the scan at 35 days as by that point they can detect a heartbeat and also check to make sure the pregnancy isn't ectopic. With Posey, the 35 day scan was the point at which we felt like it was really happening. We saw a little coffee bean on the screen. It was an amazing moment and I cried with happiness. Roll on 18 June. I want that feeling again.
Tonight I will feel like the luckiest girl alive. I thought 1 miracle would be my lot but now I have another on the way. It's such early days and feels very frightening but I will look after myself well and take each day as it comes.
Thanks to everyone who has sent me messages of support,
x
The day of my pregnancy blood test!
I have longed for today ever since Buzz and I started this IVF cycle. In fact, ever since we had our consultation at the end of March, so a good couple of months. It is now 15 days after my egg collection and 10 days after my day 5 blastocyst transfer of 1 embryo.
Do I feel pregnant today? No, not really.
Do I not feel pregnant today? No, not really.
What I do know is I only slept for about 5 hours last night and today I just feel 'strange'. My breathing is tight, like I'm about to hyperventilate or something. I have a sicky feeling in my tummy. I woke up at 6am starving again although I could hardly eat any of my cereal. I just didn't feel like it. Posey didn't eat her breakfast either. It was like she could sense I had something major on my mind! My tummy is churning and I'm not really 'with it' today. The tummy cramps I was getting yesterday afternoon have gone thankfully but I feel like my body is just uncomfortable. I've felt like that for the last few nights in bed. Not like me at all as I normally sleep like a log as soon as my head hits the pillow!
So Buzz and I have just taken her to nursery for the day. Buzz is off work all day and will be coming to the clinic with me shortly for my pregnancy blood test. The blood test detects the level of HCG in your blood by a quantitative method. Regular home pregnancy tests detect the HCG qualitatively, meaning it is possible to get a false BFP or BFN. I don't want a false result! I'm very proud of having waited until my blood test today. It has driven me mad at times but deep down I just want to know the right result, and thankfully today has finally arrived.
Buzz and I are off to do the 45 minute drive to the clinic shortly. Let's hope for a BFP!
x
x
Do I feel pregnant today? No, not really.
Do I not feel pregnant today? No, not really.
What I do know is I only slept for about 5 hours last night and today I just feel 'strange'. My breathing is tight, like I'm about to hyperventilate or something. I have a sicky feeling in my tummy. I woke up at 6am starving again although I could hardly eat any of my cereal. I just didn't feel like it. Posey didn't eat her breakfast either. It was like she could sense I had something major on my mind! My tummy is churning and I'm not really 'with it' today. The tummy cramps I was getting yesterday afternoon have gone thankfully but I feel like my body is just uncomfortable. I've felt like that for the last few nights in bed. Not like me at all as I normally sleep like a log as soon as my head hits the pillow!
So Buzz and I have just taken her to nursery for the day. Buzz is off work all day and will be coming to the clinic with me shortly for my pregnancy blood test. The blood test detects the level of HCG in your blood by a quantitative method. Regular home pregnancy tests detect the HCG qualitatively, meaning it is possible to get a false BFP or BFN. I don't want a false result! I'm very proud of having waited until my blood test today. It has driven me mad at times but deep down I just want to know the right result, and thankfully today has finally arrived.
Buzz and I are off to do the 45 minute drive to the clinic shortly. Let's hope for a BFP!
x
x
Monday 27 May 2013
What if it's a negative and I'm not pregnant?
I guess I felt compelled to write this blog post because tomorrow is my big test day. The day I find out if this IVF cycle has worked. There are 2 outcomes:
1. I am pregnant.
2. I am not pregnant.
I won't let myself believe that I'm pregnant as I know how disappointed I'll be if I'm not. Buzz and I will be ecstatic if I am pregnant and it will be lovely to give Posey a little brother or sister when she's about 2 and a half. I guess I also feel that it seems impossible that I'd be so lucky on both of my IVF cycles to fall pregnant given even the odds of a +ve test after blastocyst transfer are only around 50%.
My biggest fear today is that tomorrow my test will be negative. Today i am thinking about how on earth I would handle that outcome. It's not something I've had to cope with before fortunately. It has to be one of the toughest things you can go through.
Things that would make a -ve much easier to cope with:
I have Buzz, my loving husband.
I have Posey, who I love more and more every day, to the moon and back. She is my world.
I have a small army of loving pets at home who always want cuddles.
I have 2 successful businesses that I can pretty much dip in and out of as much as I want / need to. I've worked hard on them both.
I have plans to start my third business. My business pan is written. The thing holding me back just now is tomorrow's result! I feel like I need to wait for that first. This business plan really is something I can get my teeth right into.
I have some amazing friends who I know will be there for me. That counts for a lot.
I have some lovely twitter followers who I know are going through very similar emotions. I find that comforting and I really appreciate the support.
So, less than 24 hours until the big test! Fingers, toes, arms, legs and eyes crossed please peeps. Let's hope for a +ve. Positive thoughts, mental preparation for tomorrow and Buzz and me sticking together.
x
1. I am pregnant.
2. I am not pregnant.
I won't let myself believe that I'm pregnant as I know how disappointed I'll be if I'm not. Buzz and I will be ecstatic if I am pregnant and it will be lovely to give Posey a little brother or sister when she's about 2 and a half. I guess I also feel that it seems impossible that I'd be so lucky on both of my IVF cycles to fall pregnant given even the odds of a +ve test after blastocyst transfer are only around 50%.
My biggest fear today is that tomorrow my test will be negative. Today i am thinking about how on earth I would handle that outcome. It's not something I've had to cope with before fortunately. It has to be one of the toughest things you can go through.
Things that would make a -ve much easier to cope with:
I have Buzz, my loving husband.
I have Posey, who I love more and more every day, to the moon and back. She is my world.
I have a small army of loving pets at home who always want cuddles.
I have 2 successful businesses that I can pretty much dip in and out of as much as I want / need to. I've worked hard on them both.
I have plans to start my third business. My business pan is written. The thing holding me back just now is tomorrow's result! I feel like I need to wait for that first. This business plan really is something I can get my teeth right into.
I have some amazing friends who I know will be there for me. That counts for a lot.
I have some lovely twitter followers who I know are going through very similar emotions. I find that comforting and I really appreciate the support.
So, less than 24 hours until the big test! Fingers, toes, arms, legs and eyes crossed please peeps. Let's hope for a +ve. Positive thoughts, mental preparation for tomorrow and Buzz and me sticking together.
x
The day before test day
Ok, so I'm calling this post "the day before test day" but the truth is it is 4.18am and I am sitting in my kitchen, at the breakfast bar eating marmite crumpets and drinking a big glass of cold milk.
I woke up dying for a wee (tmi..) and starving / really thirsty at 4.05am and tossed & turned for 5 mins before realising I just needed to get up. Buzz, Posey and even the cats are snoring their heads off!
So why on earth am I awake? We have been really fortunate with Posey as she's slot from 7pm-7am each night since she was 3 months old. What an angel! (Just never get me started on her fussy eating habits....grrrrr...)
Last night we ate dinner at about 7.30pm. We had jacket potato with lots of green salad and then (Waitrose!) syrup sponge with custard - yum yum yum - custard is amazeballs! So I had plenty to eat before bed at 9.30 (I was shattered...)
Of course my mind is running away with itself. While I was pregnant with Posey I indulged in midnight feasts most nights. Jam on toast was a favourite, always with a glass of milk. You can imagine what I'm thinking now....the last 2 mornings I have woken up starving & literally have had to neck a bowl of cereal as soon as I've woken up. Then i've felt nauseous all morning. Right now I'm scoffing crumpets. Could I really be pregnant? I just don't want to think it. If I think i might be i feel like i'm tempting fate. I met hang on for my test at the clinic. I must I must I must.
Thankfully there are no HPTs in the house. If there were I think there would be a good chance I'd crack and use one. The fear of a false BFP or BFN scares me though. I've heard of too many occasions when it's happened so let's not go there.....
The cats are now looking at me like I've intruded on their quiet time! I think they might be after my glass of milk. Who can blame them? It's lush! But unfortunately for them it is nearly all drunk!
I have a nice day planned for today. Posey and I will swing round Waitrose in the morning and pop round the corner to see the bunny we're bunny sitting this weekend. Buzz and I will take her out on her trike to the swings. I'm seeing one of my best friends in the afternoon. She lives up in the midlands now so it's always great to see her. I'm also having (decaf) coffee with my best mum friend late afternoon in an attempt to divert my mind before Tuesday. I also caught up with her the day before my egg collection. She's amazing, 34 weeks pregnant herself with a 20mth old but particularly over the last few months has been there whenever I've needed her. Such a great friend :)
Over and out for now. I should probably try and get more sleep before I hear "hiya hiya mummyyyy diddyyyyyy" coming from the bedroom next door to ours at around 7am!
x
I woke up dying for a wee (tmi..) and starving / really thirsty at 4.05am and tossed & turned for 5 mins before realising I just needed to get up. Buzz, Posey and even the cats are snoring their heads off!
So why on earth am I awake? We have been really fortunate with Posey as she's slot from 7pm-7am each night since she was 3 months old. What an angel! (Just never get me started on her fussy eating habits....grrrrr...)
Last night we ate dinner at about 7.30pm. We had jacket potato with lots of green salad and then (Waitrose!) syrup sponge with custard - yum yum yum - custard is amazeballs! So I had plenty to eat before bed at 9.30 (I was shattered...)
Of course my mind is running away with itself. While I was pregnant with Posey I indulged in midnight feasts most nights. Jam on toast was a favourite, always with a glass of milk. You can imagine what I'm thinking now....the last 2 mornings I have woken up starving & literally have had to neck a bowl of cereal as soon as I've woken up. Then i've felt nauseous all morning. Right now I'm scoffing crumpets. Could I really be pregnant? I just don't want to think it. If I think i might be i feel like i'm tempting fate. I met hang on for my test at the clinic. I must I must I must.
Thankfully there are no HPTs in the house. If there were I think there would be a good chance I'd crack and use one. The fear of a false BFP or BFN scares me though. I've heard of too many occasions when it's happened so let's not go there.....
The cats are now looking at me like I've intruded on their quiet time! I think they might be after my glass of milk. Who can blame them? It's lush! But unfortunately for them it is nearly all drunk!
I have a nice day planned for today. Posey and I will swing round Waitrose in the morning and pop round the corner to see the bunny we're bunny sitting this weekend. Buzz and I will take her out on her trike to the swings. I'm seeing one of my best friends in the afternoon. She lives up in the midlands now so it's always great to see her. I'm also having (decaf) coffee with my best mum friend late afternoon in an attempt to divert my mind before Tuesday. I also caught up with her the day before my egg collection. She's amazing, 34 weeks pregnant herself with a 20mth old but particularly over the last few months has been there whenever I've needed her. Such a great friend :)
Over and out for now. I should probably try and get more sleep before I hear "hiya hiya mummyyyy diddyyyyyy" coming from the bedroom next door to ours at around 7am!
x
Sunday 26 May 2013
2 days left of the 2ww :)
Today is Sunday and my blood test to find out if I am pregnant is booked for Tuesday morning. Thankfully Monday is a bank holiday so I have Buzz around to keep me sane during the remainder of the wait and of course Posey is here to keep me busy....!
The last 2 mornings I have been waking up after 8+ hours of sleep feeling really ropey. I have felt nauseous, super tired and absolutely starving! Anyone would think I'd had no dinner or supper the night before! The nausea has come and gone through the day, not actually coming to anything but it's just not a nice feeling. I feel like I have excess saliva too. Thankfully the tummy cramps I had earlier in my 2ww have subsided and my tummy feels normal again. I say 'normal' although of course I have no idea what's going on in there until I have my test on Tuesday.
I'm really trying to listen to my body. Sleep when I need to, eat when I need to and just sit down and do nothing when I feel like it. Not always easy with a 1 year old but I'm doing ok!
Roll on Tuesday...x
The last 2 mornings I have been waking up after 8+ hours of sleep feeling really ropey. I have felt nauseous, super tired and absolutely starving! Anyone would think I'd had no dinner or supper the night before! The nausea has come and gone through the day, not actually coming to anything but it's just not a nice feeling. I feel like I have excess saliva too. Thankfully the tummy cramps I had earlier in my 2ww have subsided and my tummy feels normal again. I say 'normal' although of course I have no idea what's going on in there until I have my test on Tuesday.
I'm really trying to listen to my body. Sleep when I need to, eat when I need to and just sit down and do nothing when I feel like it. Not always easy with a 1 year old but I'm doing ok!
Roll on Tuesday...x
Friday 24 May 2013
Over-analysing everything during the 2ww!
During the dreaded 2ww I had with Posey I can remember reading into all symptoms I had. Was I pregnant? wasn't I pregnant? Were the tummy pains just wind? What on earth was going on?!?!?!
This time is the same....I have felt pretty ok since my blastocyst transfer. I've felt a little more tired than usual (which could just be that I'm finding it hard to switch off) but last night and today I have felt exhausted and I have been having proper tummy cramps. Maybe it is just wind!
These tummy cramps don't even keep coming in the same place. They're sometimes sharp and are almost like bloating pains. Not nice. I have read all sorts of things online of course and tummy cramps can both be a positive symptom as well as a negative symptom. I can't be sure which is true for me as I have no spotting, bleeding or anything else.
Keep your fingers, toes, eyes, arms and legs crossed for me all is ok. I really hope it is.
x
This time is the same....I have felt pretty ok since my blastocyst transfer. I've felt a little more tired than usual (which could just be that I'm finding it hard to switch off) but last night and today I have felt exhausted and I have been having proper tummy cramps. Maybe it is just wind!
These tummy cramps don't even keep coming in the same place. They're sometimes sharp and are almost like bloating pains. Not nice. I have read all sorts of things online of course and tummy cramps can both be a positive symptom as well as a negative symptom. I can't be sure which is true for me as I have no spotting, bleeding or anything else.
Keep your fingers, toes, eyes, arms and legs crossed for me all is ok. I really hope it is.
x
Thursday 23 May 2013
Over half way through the 2ww
I've often read articles on IVF that mention how the whole 2ww can be the hardest part of IVF treatment for many. For me, that's absolutely right.
In the run up to egg collection and embryo / blastocyst transfer you have around a month of down reg and stims injections, so there's something happening every day. You also have your scans to check how your little follicles are growing. It kind of keeps you going knowing you have an injection to do that night and every one you do is one closer to the end result. On the 2ww you're literally waiting!!
I was quite fortunate this time as I had my egg collection on day 0 then blastocyst transfer on day 5. We are now on day 9. My pregnancy blood test is booked for day 15, so I only really have 10 days to wait between transfer and testing.
Clinics tend to advise you not to test early as the levels of HCG in your blood can give false positives or negatives as you can still have an amount of HCG left in your system from the trigger shot you take before egg collection.
I have no pregnancy tests in my house and I'm determined to get to my blood test on day 15 without testing at home first. I want to be certain of the result. It is driving me a little insane though. I have no idea if my little embie has stuck. I want to know NOW but I know I must wait just a few more days.
x
In the run up to egg collection and embryo / blastocyst transfer you have around a month of down reg and stims injections, so there's something happening every day. You also have your scans to check how your little follicles are growing. It kind of keeps you going knowing you have an injection to do that night and every one you do is one closer to the end result. On the 2ww you're literally waiting!!
I was quite fortunate this time as I had my egg collection on day 0 then blastocyst transfer on day 5. We are now on day 9. My pregnancy blood test is booked for day 15, so I only really have 10 days to wait between transfer and testing.
Clinics tend to advise you not to test early as the levels of HCG in your blood can give false positives or negatives as you can still have an amount of HCG left in your system from the trigger shot you take before egg collection.
I have no pregnancy tests in my house and I'm determined to get to my blood test on day 15 without testing at home first. I want to be certain of the result. It is driving me a little insane though. I have no idea if my little embie has stuck. I want to know NOW but I know I must wait just a few more days.
x
Monday 20 May 2013
The 2 week wait...
The 2 week wait refers to the time between blastocyst / embryo transfer and the date you test to find out if you are pregnant or not.
I found the 2ww really hard when I was trying to conceive Posey. I was at my wit's end and I'd been TTC for 3.5 years. I wasn't sure how I'd get through the wait. I'd had a day 2 transfer and then my test day was day 18. 16 days to wait!!! I cracked and tested 2 days early, and got a BFP. I then tested on my test day and got another BFP. The clinic then told me to test a week later. Thankfully I got another BFP! I felt euphorius! I was incredibly fortunate.
This time I'm 2 days on from my transfer and I'm testing on day 15. Much less time to wait and my test date is 1 week tomorrow. It's a blood test at the clinic rather than a home testing stick. I'm going to find it very very hard not to do a HPT on that morning or the day before. I fear anxiety may get the better of me. We shall see!
x
I found the 2ww really hard when I was trying to conceive Posey. I was at my wit's end and I'd been TTC for 3.5 years. I wasn't sure how I'd get through the wait. I'd had a day 2 transfer and then my test day was day 18. 16 days to wait!!! I cracked and tested 2 days early, and got a BFP. I then tested on my test day and got another BFP. The clinic then told me to test a week later. Thankfully I got another BFP! I felt euphorius! I was incredibly fortunate.
This time I'm 2 days on from my transfer and I'm testing on day 15. Much less time to wait and my test date is 1 week tomorrow. It's a blood test at the clinic rather than a home testing stick. I'm going to find it very very hard not to do a HPT on that morning or the day before. I fear anxiety may get the better of me. We shall see!
x
Saturday 18 May 2013
My day 5 blastocyst transfer
Phew! We've had our transfer today. I can honestly say there was no discomfort and it was all over within 20 minutes.
We had 5 grade A blastocysts, which is an absolutely amazing result and we're feeling really proud of ourselves. The clinic asked us how many we'd like to have transferred. Buzz and I had already talked it through in detail and we decided on just 1. Although i'm 35 (36 ths year!) I only carried Posey to 35 weeks and ten she spent 10 days on neonatal care. With everything in mind, we decided 2 would carry more risks and 1 was the right answer.
For transfer, the consultant inserts a speculum inside you (like a cervical smear) and then the embryo is placed inside you on the end of a long catheter. Buzz and I watched it all on the monitor and at the end there was a little bright white light shining away in my ovary. Our little ray of light.
And now begins the 2 week wait. Although it's actually a 9 day wait! We have a blood test on Tue 28 May to establish whether or not I am pregnant. Not counting today and that day there are only 9 days between now and then! Not long at all. With Posey we had a 16 day wait so this wait will be shorter.
I don't have too much planned for the next 10 days or so. Just plenty of family time and time with Posey. I'll work when I need to but as I have my businesses I'm fortunate that I can pick and choose my hours and how much work I do.
I must continue taking my crinone progesterone supplements (lovely as they are...) as they will help my uterus get used to the idea of pregnancy. Other than that, I can carry on as normal. I'll eat well, get plenty of rest and enjoy Posey time!
One more thing....I am PUPO...pregnant until proven otherwise!!!!!
x
We had 5 grade A blastocysts, which is an absolutely amazing result and we're feeling really proud of ourselves. The clinic asked us how many we'd like to have transferred. Buzz and I had already talked it through in detail and we decided on just 1. Although i'm 35 (36 ths year!) I only carried Posey to 35 weeks and ten she spent 10 days on neonatal care. With everything in mind, we decided 2 would carry more risks and 1 was the right answer.
For transfer, the consultant inserts a speculum inside you (like a cervical smear) and then the embryo is placed inside you on the end of a long catheter. Buzz and I watched it all on the monitor and at the end there was a little bright white light shining away in my ovary. Our little ray of light.
And now begins the 2 week wait. Although it's actually a 9 day wait! We have a blood test on Tue 28 May to establish whether or not I am pregnant. Not counting today and that day there are only 9 days between now and then! Not long at all. With Posey we had a 16 day wait so this wait will be shorter.
I don't have too much planned for the next 10 days or so. Just plenty of family time and time with Posey. I'll work when I need to but as I have my businesses I'm fortunate that I can pick and choose my hours and how much work I do.
I must continue taking my crinone progesterone supplements (lovely as they are...) as they will help my uterus get used to the idea of pregnancy. Other than that, I can carry on as normal. I'll eat well, get plenty of rest and enjoy Posey time!
One more thing....I am PUPO...pregnant until proven otherwise!!!!!
x
Friday 17 May 2013
Trying IVF again with a toddler in tow
I thought I'd write a little bit about what it's like to try IVF again once you already have one child.
The truth is, until Posey was about 16 months I was hellbent on not going through it all again. It's physically, mentally and emotionally tiring. The fact it took 4 years to have Posey, she was then born prematurely and spent time on the neonatal ward and then I shortly developed post natal depression scarred me and I didn't feel able to cope with any more treatment. I felt too weak.
Then one week I started to feel like I could think about doing it again. Posey was coming up to 18 months and she'd become like my little friend. Much less like a little person who just needed things all the time and literally took up my whole life. I loved her as a baby, I really did, but I guess my years spent TTC were full of flash holidays, silly cars, fancy restaurants, compiling the best handbag collection outside Selfridges and spending all of my money on ME! That was my way of getting through the emotional pain of struggling to start a family. Then before I'd even started my mat leave she was here, needing me 24-7 and I found it so hard to adjust. Buzz and I both did. It was blooming tough and although we knew we were incredibly fortunate we really really struggled. We live a long way from our families too so we didn't have a lot of support nearby.
Anyway....when Posey was about 18mths Buzz said to me one day that he'd like to try for another baby. I just cried. I felt ecstatic. So that was my answer. The fact I was overjoyed told me that I wanted it too. We booked a consultation at the IVF clinic without delay. There was a 6 week wait so we had plenty of time to really think things through and be 100% sure it was what we both wanted.
One of my biggest concerns was the potential impact on Posey. But it's been fine! I feel ok, Buzz feels ok and therefore Posey thinks everything is 'normal.' I do worry that if this doesn't work we on't be ourselves and will have to get an amazing amount of strength from somewhere to show Posey that we are 'ok' but we will stick together and do that if we have to.
I have done everything as normal with Posey. I did all my injections at 7pm once she was in bed and I've taken her to all her usual nursery days, dance classes, music classes etc etc. life has been what she is used to. I only had to take her to the clinic once and she loved it! The nurses loved her and she happily played with the toys and books in the waiting room. It was ok!
Posey has made me realise that I'm a great mum. She is such an amazing little person and we can even have little conversations with each other now. She's my little friend, my little partner in crime.
I really hope Buzz and I can give Posey a little brother or sister x
The truth is, until Posey was about 16 months I was hellbent on not going through it all again. It's physically, mentally and emotionally tiring. The fact it took 4 years to have Posey, she was then born prematurely and spent time on the neonatal ward and then I shortly developed post natal depression scarred me and I didn't feel able to cope with any more treatment. I felt too weak.
Then one week I started to feel like I could think about doing it again. Posey was coming up to 18 months and she'd become like my little friend. Much less like a little person who just needed things all the time and literally took up my whole life. I loved her as a baby, I really did, but I guess my years spent TTC were full of flash holidays, silly cars, fancy restaurants, compiling the best handbag collection outside Selfridges and spending all of my money on ME! That was my way of getting through the emotional pain of struggling to start a family. Then before I'd even started my mat leave she was here, needing me 24-7 and I found it so hard to adjust. Buzz and I both did. It was blooming tough and although we knew we were incredibly fortunate we really really struggled. We live a long way from our families too so we didn't have a lot of support nearby.
Anyway....when Posey was about 18mths Buzz said to me one day that he'd like to try for another baby. I just cried. I felt ecstatic. So that was my answer. The fact I was overjoyed told me that I wanted it too. We booked a consultation at the IVF clinic without delay. There was a 6 week wait so we had plenty of time to really think things through and be 100% sure it was what we both wanted.
One of my biggest concerns was the potential impact on Posey. But it's been fine! I feel ok, Buzz feels ok and therefore Posey thinks everything is 'normal.' I do worry that if this doesn't work we on't be ourselves and will have to get an amazing amount of strength from somewhere to show Posey that we are 'ok' but we will stick together and do that if we have to.
I have done everything as normal with Posey. I did all my injections at 7pm once she was in bed and I've taken her to all her usual nursery days, dance classes, music classes etc etc. life has been what she is used to. I only had to take her to the clinic once and she loved it! The nurses loved her and she happily played with the toys and books in the waiting room. It was ok!
Posey has made me realise that I'm a great mum. She is such an amazing little person and we can even have little conversations with each other now. She's my little friend, my little partner in crime.
I really hope Buzz and I can give Posey a little brother or sister x
Thursday 16 May 2013
Day 3 after my egg collection and a big decision to make
So today is day 3 after egg collection. I am very very happy to say that Buzz and I still have 11 viable embryos. I can't quite believe it. It's a football team!
I'm also happy to be having day 5 blastocyst transfer this time. With Posey, as we only had 1 embryo we had day 2 transfer. Things feel quite different this time. We're still a long way off me actually being pregnant and being able to look forward to a new arrival however. Even with day 5 blastocyst transfer the success chances they quote are around the 50% mark. Buzz and I ave to really hope we're in the successful 50%.
I feel ok today. The last couple of days plus my EC day I have had pretty uncomfortable tummy pains and bloating. Not nice. Having said that i've only had 1 Panadol since EC so it's not like I'm in a lot of pain. I'm very used to being busy being mum to Posey and running my businesses and not really just chilling out. I'm normally a bundle of energy but I haven't felt like that this week!
One thing is very much on my mind. How many embryos should we have put back in, all being well on day 5...? My head says 1. My heart says 2. I love being a mum. I'm 35. I don't have forever. But I only carried Posey to 35 weeks so would I be putting the babies' as well as my health at risk by trying to carry 2. Buzz and I have A LOT of thinking to do....what a flattering position to be in but what a conundrum....
x
I'm also happy to be having day 5 blastocyst transfer this time. With Posey, as we only had 1 embryo we had day 2 transfer. Things feel quite different this time. We're still a long way off me actually being pregnant and being able to look forward to a new arrival however. Even with day 5 blastocyst transfer the success chances they quote are around the 50% mark. Buzz and I ave to really hope we're in the successful 50%.
I feel ok today. The last couple of days plus my EC day I have had pretty uncomfortable tummy pains and bloating. Not nice. Having said that i've only had 1 Panadol since EC so it's not like I'm in a lot of pain. I'm very used to being busy being mum to Posey and running my businesses and not really just chilling out. I'm normally a bundle of energy but I haven't felt like that this week!
One thing is very much on my mind. How many embryos should we have put back in, all being well on day 5...? My head says 1. My heart says 2. I love being a mum. I'm 35. I don't have forever. But I only carried Posey to 35 weeks so would I be putting the babies' as well as my health at risk by trying to carry 2. Buzz and I have A LOT of thinking to do....what a flattering position to be in but what a conundrum....
x
Tuesday 14 May 2013
Coco's Baby Journey: About Coco (me!)
Coco's Baby Journey: About Coco (me!): Hi there, I'm Coco and this is my first blog post. I thought I should write a little bit about what I will be blogging about and tell y...
The day after my egg collection
Hip hip hooray! I am feeling good. I have just spoken to my clinic and out of the 16 eggs I had yesterday, 14 were suitable for ICSI and 11 are showing signs of fertilisation!
I am stunned. Last time we had 12 collected and only 1 showed signs of fertilisation the day after, so we had to have day 2 transfer. It makes me feel like the luckiest girl alive to think that that 1 egg is currently terrorising everyone at nursery and eating them out of house and home :)
What a turn around. Buzz and I now need to keep all our fingers and toes crossed that these 11 eggs continue to thrive. We're well aware that the numbers are very likely to fall but we really really hope to get to day 5 blastocyst transfer and for there to be more than 1 embryo by that point.
Love from one very happy mummy x
I am stunned. Last time we had 12 collected and only 1 showed signs of fertilisation the day after, so we had to have day 2 transfer. It makes me feel like the luckiest girl alive to think that that 1 egg is currently terrorising everyone at nursery and eating them out of house and home :)
What a turn around. Buzz and I now need to keep all our fingers and toes crossed that these 11 eggs continue to thrive. We're well aware that the numbers are very likely to fall but we really really hope to get to day 5 blastocyst transfer and for there to be more than 1 embryo by that point.
Love from one very happy mummy x
Monday 13 May 2013
My egg collection
This morning I had my egg collection! I was the first appointment today so everything was running on time. I have felt a little delicate and a bit sick since the collection but other than that I'm ok. I haven't had to take any painkillers.
Here's how things went.....
The nurse gave me pethidine, a suppository and a warm bag to put over my hand prior to going into theatre. Once in theatre the nurses there attached a canular to my hand so that they could administer my antibiotics while my eggs were being collected. My legs were apart & strapped down in stirrups and I had to lay on my back. I was pretty much covered up so I didn't feel too exposed. I met the embryologist before things started too.
My collection started with a wash, like kind of warm water and then the consultant inserted a smear-type speculum into me and wiped around a bit. Next the long tube with the needle on the end was inserted and the fluid was sucked out of my follicles in each ovary. Felt a sharp pain as the needle entered each ovary but that only lasted for about 2 seconds. Apart from little sharp pains that lasted literally a few seconds I was pretty comfortable.
My egg collection lasted about 20 minutes and at the end the consultant said I had 16 eggs! I'm really happy with that. I had 12 collected for my treatment to have Posey and I'm 2.5 years older so it's a good result!
This afternoon the embryologist and her team will be washing and concentrating the 'sample' Buzz did and analysing my eggs ready to choose the best ones to perform ICSI with. Overnight we have to keep our fingers and toes crossed for some fertilisation!
After collection I was taken back to my room and the nurse took my blood pressure, which was fine. I felt a bit dizzy and wobbly, which could just have been because I hadn't eaten more than 12 hours! The nurse said it was normal. She then brought me a nice cheese sandwich and a cup of tea - very welcome!
Buzz and I were then left to chill out and read while I recovered and then an hour later the nurse removed my canular and I got dressed. I was bleeding lightly, which is also very normal.
Next Buzz and I went to the pharmacy department to collect some crinone pessaries. Basically they are progesterone supplements that you squirt into you every evening. They help to prepare your uterus for pregnancy. After using them each evening you have to keep moving for 15-20 minutes so the crinone can spread itself around!
I really missed Posey today. I last saw her awake at 7pm last night and then didn't see her until 4.15 this afternoon as she was still asleep when Buzz and I left the house at 6.40am today. She was having a nap when we got home at lunchtime and I was so shattered I went for a 2 hour nap too so by the time I woke up Buzz had gone out with her & my mum, as my mum had been looking after her today. She'd been as good as gold apparently! Posey gave me a very big hug when they got home :)
I still feel a bit delicate now but hopefully after a nice light omelette for my dinner and an early night I'll be on form tomorrow. I was last time so I'm hoping this time will be the same.
x
Here's how things went.....
The nurse gave me pethidine, a suppository and a warm bag to put over my hand prior to going into theatre. Once in theatre the nurses there attached a canular to my hand so that they could administer my antibiotics while my eggs were being collected. My legs were apart & strapped down in stirrups and I had to lay on my back. I was pretty much covered up so I didn't feel too exposed. I met the embryologist before things started too.
My collection started with a wash, like kind of warm water and then the consultant inserted a smear-type speculum into me and wiped around a bit. Next the long tube with the needle on the end was inserted and the fluid was sucked out of my follicles in each ovary. Felt a sharp pain as the needle entered each ovary but that only lasted for about 2 seconds. Apart from little sharp pains that lasted literally a few seconds I was pretty comfortable.
My egg collection lasted about 20 minutes and at the end the consultant said I had 16 eggs! I'm really happy with that. I had 12 collected for my treatment to have Posey and I'm 2.5 years older so it's a good result!
This afternoon the embryologist and her team will be washing and concentrating the 'sample' Buzz did and analysing my eggs ready to choose the best ones to perform ICSI with. Overnight we have to keep our fingers and toes crossed for some fertilisation!
After collection I was taken back to my room and the nurse took my blood pressure, which was fine. I felt a bit dizzy and wobbly, which could just have been because I hadn't eaten more than 12 hours! The nurse said it was normal. She then brought me a nice cheese sandwich and a cup of tea - very welcome!
Buzz and I were then left to chill out and read while I recovered and then an hour later the nurse removed my canular and I got dressed. I was bleeding lightly, which is also very normal.
Next Buzz and I went to the pharmacy department to collect some crinone pessaries. Basically they are progesterone supplements that you squirt into you every evening. They help to prepare your uterus for pregnancy. After using them each evening you have to keep moving for 15-20 minutes so the crinone can spread itself around!
I really missed Posey today. I last saw her awake at 7pm last night and then didn't see her until 4.15 this afternoon as she was still asleep when Buzz and I left the house at 6.40am today. She was having a nap when we got home at lunchtime and I was so shattered I went for a 2 hour nap too so by the time I woke up Buzz had gone out with her & my mum, as my mum had been looking after her today. She'd been as good as gold apparently! Posey gave me a very big hug when they got home :)
I still feel a bit delicate now but hopefully after a nice light omelette for my dinner and an early night I'll be on form tomorrow. I was last time so I'm hoping this time will be the same.
x
Egg Collection day!
Hurray - today is the day! I'm not sure the word excitement describes how I feel but I certainly feel nervous with anticipation and anxious about them not being able to collect my eggs / how many eggs they'll collect / how those eggs will fertilise....all very normal concerns I'm sure.
We were at the clinic on time ths morning at 7.30am and since then one of the nurses has talked me through what's happening before the procedure. She has also taken my temperature and blood pressure, both of which are ok :)
I know the consultant who will be in charge of my egg collection. He seems like a nice chap so I feel ok that it's him.
I have a few forms to read through about recovery after egg collection and a little tick box sheet for what kind of sandwich I fancy once I'm ready - nice! I think I might play safe & go with cheese on brown bread.
Buzz has also filled in his form before he goes to 'do his bit.' I think he's feeling quite nervous...
The consultant is coming to see me in about half an hour and by then I imagine the nurses will have told me to get into my gown. It's a bit chilly in here just now so I hope it warms up!) and then I'll have a pethidine injection to help relax me and local anaesthetic plus a suppository (yuck!). I coped last time though so i'm sure I'll be ok today. I get painful and uncomfortable things in perspective these days by reminding myself that I've had a baby so I can cope with anything lol!
I'm feeling quite relaxed just now. Buzz and I are sitting in my room reading magazines and blogging! Buzz has just gone to get a cup of tea. God I could murder a cup of tea. Not for me until after egg collection though...
Over & out. Keep your fingers and toes crossed for me ths morning please. Once I'm all done & feel ok I'll write an update.
x
We were at the clinic on time ths morning at 7.30am and since then one of the nurses has talked me through what's happening before the procedure. She has also taken my temperature and blood pressure, both of which are ok :)
I know the consultant who will be in charge of my egg collection. He seems like a nice chap so I feel ok that it's him.
I have a few forms to read through about recovery after egg collection and a little tick box sheet for what kind of sandwich I fancy once I'm ready - nice! I think I might play safe & go with cheese on brown bread.
Buzz has also filled in his form before he goes to 'do his bit.' I think he's feeling quite nervous...
The consultant is coming to see me in about half an hour and by then I imagine the nurses will have told me to get into my gown. It's a bit chilly in here just now so I hope it warms up!) and then I'll have a pethidine injection to help relax me and local anaesthetic plus a suppository (yuck!). I coped last time though so i'm sure I'll be ok today. I get painful and uncomfortable things in perspective these days by reminding myself that I've had a baby so I can cope with anything lol!
I'm feeling quite relaxed just now. Buzz and I are sitting in my room reading magazines and blogging! Buzz has just gone to get a cup of tea. God I could murder a cup of tea. Not for me until after egg collection though...
Over & out. Keep your fingers and toes crossed for me ths morning please. Once I'm all done & feel ok I'll write an update.
x
Sunday 12 May 2013
Coco C is now on twitter!
I'm now publishing my posts on twitter so please follow me for updates on how things are going.
@cococdiary
Email me at cococdiary@gmail.com
x
@cococdiary
Email me at cococdiary@gmail.com
x
My (injection free) day before egg collection
So last night at 10pm I injected my HCG trigger shot, which will get all of my mature eggs ready for collection! Was it painful? Yep, it hurt all right. It was the most painful and longest injection of the lot, but also the nicest as it was the last one. Afterwards, I had a nice bowl of coco shreddies and then off I went to bed.
The bloated feeling is definitely still here today, but then I imagine it'll be here until at least after egg collection tomorrow. This time tomorrow my eggs will have been collected and will (hopefully) be being fertilised. I hope I feel ok after egg collection. I was quite sick last time and Buzz had to stop the car on the way home. I was ok once I got home though and just had a big afternoon nap.
I guess today I feel happy that I have no more injections. But I also feel anxious and nervous. Not about the egg collection procedure itself but about how many eggs we'll get and how many will fertilise and become embryos. I'm scared we'll get no eggs! Then I think if we do get eggs collected none will fertilise! Who knows.. We will see tomorrow and then the next day when we make the call to the clinic to see how any fertilisation has gone overnight.
Fingers and toes crossed please x
The bloated feeling is definitely still here today, but then I imagine it'll be here until at least after egg collection tomorrow. This time tomorrow my eggs will have been collected and will (hopefully) be being fertilised. I hope I feel ok after egg collection. I was quite sick last time and Buzz had to stop the car on the way home. I was ok once I got home though and just had a big afternoon nap.
I guess today I feel happy that I have no more injections. But I also feel anxious and nervous. Not about the egg collection procedure itself but about how many eggs we'll get and how many will fertilise and become embryos. I'm scared we'll get no eggs! Then I think if we do get eggs collected none will fertilise! Who knows.. We will see tomorrow and then the next day when we make the call to the clinic to see how any fertilisation has gone overnight.
Fingers and toes crossed please x
Saturday 11 May 2013
The day I take my IVF trigger injection!
So today is Trigger day! The clinic called me this afternoon to confirm I needed to take my trigger injection tonight for egg collection on Monday!
The instructions I have are to take my current dose of down reg drugs at 6.45pm (normal time) and then take my Ovitrelle (the trigger injection) at 10pm tonight so egg collection can take place at 10am on Monday. The trigger injection gets the mature eggs right to the ideal state before collection. I have set the alarm on my phone for 10pm tonight (not that I think I'll forget come 10pm for a second!)
The clinic gave me some other instructions too. Very similar to last time. The night before EC I can't eat after midnight and I can't even have water after 7am. I need to pack my dressing gown and slippers and wear no make up or jewellery.
Buzz and I need to be there for 7.30am on Monday to be in theatre for 9.30am. Between 7.30 and 9.30am the nurses will get me settled in and talk me through what's going to happen, ensure I understand everything and get me all ready for the big event. I'll also meet the consultant who will be doing my egg collection. Buzz will also have to do his 'sample.'
Having had egg collection before and read up lots about it to refresh my memory in short they insert a catheter style tube inside you & suck the eggs out into little test tubes one by one. The more eggs you have the longer it takes. At my last scan I had 19. On egg collection when we conceived Posey I had 12 collected. I really hope we get a good number on Monday. Once all the eggs have been collected the embryologists then mix the (washed and concentrated) sperm in with the eggs and everyone keeps their fingers and toes crossed for fertilisation of at least 1 egg. We only got 1 last time. It was a good one mind. She is currently sitting in her highchair eating grapes!
This time we are having IVF with ICSI. The was recommended to us as last time only 1 egg out of 12 fertilised. They expect around 70% of your eggs to fertilise so we were well below that. Hence the need for ICSI this time. During ICSI they select 1 god egg and 1 good sperm and inject the sperm straight into the egg. If there are a number of good eggs they will do this with each one.
How do I feel?
Scared, excited, hopeful, and fortunate to have got this far to quote a few words. I also feel very bloated!!!! But then I have round 19 eggs inside me, most measuring 15mm +!! I don't even feel hungry but I will eat as I'm trying to have lots of protein, iron and water.
Right, time for some dinner and then onwards to injection time!
x
The instructions I have are to take my current dose of down reg drugs at 6.45pm (normal time) and then take my Ovitrelle (the trigger injection) at 10pm tonight so egg collection can take place at 10am on Monday. The trigger injection gets the mature eggs right to the ideal state before collection. I have set the alarm on my phone for 10pm tonight (not that I think I'll forget come 10pm for a second!)
The clinic gave me some other instructions too. Very similar to last time. The night before EC I can't eat after midnight and I can't even have water after 7am. I need to pack my dressing gown and slippers and wear no make up or jewellery.
Buzz and I need to be there for 7.30am on Monday to be in theatre for 9.30am. Between 7.30 and 9.30am the nurses will get me settled in and talk me through what's going to happen, ensure I understand everything and get me all ready for the big event. I'll also meet the consultant who will be doing my egg collection. Buzz will also have to do his 'sample.'
Having had egg collection before and read up lots about it to refresh my memory in short they insert a catheter style tube inside you & suck the eggs out into little test tubes one by one. The more eggs you have the longer it takes. At my last scan I had 19. On egg collection when we conceived Posey I had 12 collected. I really hope we get a good number on Monday. Once all the eggs have been collected the embryologists then mix the (washed and concentrated) sperm in with the eggs and everyone keeps their fingers and toes crossed for fertilisation of at least 1 egg. We only got 1 last time. It was a good one mind. She is currently sitting in her highchair eating grapes!
This time we are having IVF with ICSI. The was recommended to us as last time only 1 egg out of 12 fertilised. They expect around 70% of your eggs to fertilise so we were well below that. Hence the need for ICSI this time. During ICSI they select 1 god egg and 1 good sperm and inject the sperm straight into the egg. If there are a number of good eggs they will do this with each one.
How do I feel?
Scared, excited, hopeful, and fortunate to have got this far to quote a few words. I also feel very bloated!!!! But then I have round 19 eggs inside me, most measuring 15mm +!! I don't even feel hungry but I will eat as I'm trying to have lots of protein, iron and water.
Right, time for some dinner and then onwards to injection time!
x
Thursday 9 May 2013
Day 9 of stimming + scan + taking my toddler!
Wowzers! So today was my last trip to the clinic before egg collection!
I had a good visit at the clinic today. I have 19 follicles, 5 of which measure above 15mm so the clinic are happy. I have to carry on with my stims for the next 2 nights and then on Saturday I need to take the trigger injection. The nurses will call me on Saturday afternoon to give me instructions on what time to take the trigger, what time my EC will be on Monday and to take me through all the prep information I need to know.
I took Posey to the clinic with me today and (thankfully..) she was as good as gold! The nurses cooed over her and helped to keep her entertained while I was having my scan, bloods taken and getting more drugs from the pharmacy room. She slept most of the way there and back too :)
It felt very odd having Posey with me at the clinic as I have such vivid memories of my treatment there when I conceived her. I'd be lying if I said I didn't well up once or twice just thinking about how much I longed to have her and that when I was having treatment to conceive her I had no idea if it would EVER happen. Fortunately I am one of the lucky ones and I have my little miracle. There was another lady there today who had a little boy who is 3 months older than Posey. We chatted for a few minutes and she said she felt overwhelmed by having him there as well. I guess it's natural to feel that way. I relly hope that other couples (who are yet to conceive) who saw me there with Posey today felt like IVF CAN work, and that I kind of gave them hope rather than them feel like I was rubbing it in their faces. When I saw other babies / toddlers there during my first treatment I felt like they gave me hope.
So, onwards with 2 more days of stimming and then the trigger on Saturday. Sunday will feel good as there will be no injections to do, but I think the nerves I'll feel about Monday will more than occupy my mind.
x
I had a good visit at the clinic today. I have 19 follicles, 5 of which measure above 15mm so the clinic are happy. I have to carry on with my stims for the next 2 nights and then on Saturday I need to take the trigger injection. The nurses will call me on Saturday afternoon to give me instructions on what time to take the trigger, what time my EC will be on Monday and to take me through all the prep information I need to know.
I took Posey to the clinic with me today and (thankfully..) she was as good as gold! The nurses cooed over her and helped to keep her entertained while I was having my scan, bloods taken and getting more drugs from the pharmacy room. She slept most of the way there and back too :)
It felt very odd having Posey with me at the clinic as I have such vivid memories of my treatment there when I conceived her. I'd be lying if I said I didn't well up once or twice just thinking about how much I longed to have her and that when I was having treatment to conceive her I had no idea if it would EVER happen. Fortunately I am one of the lucky ones and I have my little miracle. There was another lady there today who had a little boy who is 3 months older than Posey. We chatted for a few minutes and she said she felt overwhelmed by having him there as well. I guess it's natural to feel that way. I relly hope that other couples (who are yet to conceive) who saw me there with Posey today felt like IVF CAN work, and that I kind of gave them hope rather than them feel like I was rubbing it in their faces. When I saw other babies / toddlers there during my first treatment I felt like they gave me hope.
So, onwards with 2 more days of stimming and then the trigger on Saturday. Sunday will feel good as there will be no injections to do, but I think the nerves I'll feel about Monday will more than occupy my mind.
x
Tuesday 7 May 2013
Day 7 of stimming + scan
Today I had my first scan since I started on the stims. I felt pretty nervous this morning to be honest. I think it's very easy to feel like nothing is going on inside you and wonder whether all these injections are actually doing anything!
Anyway...I had my scan before my bloods today, which was a relief as I felt like I was about to explode with anticipation. My first sigh of relief was when the nurse said my uterus lining was thickening up nicely. The sighs of relief kept coming as she then counted and measured my follicles - 20 in total, the biggest of which is 18mm!!! No wonder I've been feeling a bit bloated. I'm only short and a size 8 on a heavy day so all these little follicles must be pushing my tummy out to make space for themselves!
At the end of my scan the nurse said things were coming along nicely. It was so good to hear that.
Next up I had my bloods. They went fine and unless I get a call from the clinic this afternoon I'm to stick with my 0.2 suprecur and 150 Gonal f for tonight and tomorrow until I go for my next scan on Thursday morning.
This round of IVF seems to be remarkably similar to my Posey round as my follicles are growing at the same pace. Amazing given I'm 2.5 years older and am 35!
The nurses estimate my egg collection will be on Monday, which will be day 12. Wow, only 5 days away!
When I go for my scan on Thursday I'll have to take Posey with me as she won't be at nursery that day. The nurses reassured me today that it'll be fine and they'll help to keep her occupied while I'm having my scan and bloods. They sad they'd love to meet her seeing as she's 'one of their babies.' It must be nice for them to see babies that they helped to conceive. It must be right up there in terms of job satisfaction!
x
Anyway...I had my scan before my bloods today, which was a relief as I felt like I was about to explode with anticipation. My first sigh of relief was when the nurse said my uterus lining was thickening up nicely. The sighs of relief kept coming as she then counted and measured my follicles - 20 in total, the biggest of which is 18mm!!! No wonder I've been feeling a bit bloated. I'm only short and a size 8 on a heavy day so all these little follicles must be pushing my tummy out to make space for themselves!
At the end of my scan the nurse said things were coming along nicely. It was so good to hear that.
Next up I had my bloods. They went fine and unless I get a call from the clinic this afternoon I'm to stick with my 0.2 suprecur and 150 Gonal f for tonight and tomorrow until I go for my next scan on Thursday morning.
This round of IVF seems to be remarkably similar to my Posey round as my follicles are growing at the same pace. Amazing given I'm 2.5 years older and am 35!
The nurses estimate my egg collection will be on Monday, which will be day 12. Wow, only 5 days away!
When I go for my scan on Thursday I'll have to take Posey with me as she won't be at nursery that day. The nurses reassured me today that it'll be fine and they'll help to keep her occupied while I'm having my scan and bloods. They sad they'd love to meet her seeing as she's 'one of their babies.' It must be nice for them to see babies that they helped to conceive. It must be right up there in terms of job satisfaction!
x
Sunday 5 May 2013
Day 5 of stimming
The tiredness....oh the tiredness! This is by far my biggest side effect of stimming so far. As I type I am also having a hot flush, which isn't nice but they only last about 2 minutes. Tiredness hits me T about 8pm each evening!
I've been going to bed between 9 and 10pm every night (same as usual...!) and getting up between 6 and 7am. I'm definitely getting my 8 hours sleep, often more. Posey is great, she sleeps 7-7 every night plus around 2 hours at lunchtime, so it's not like I'm up and down with her at night! She's a little bag of energy in the day though and looking after her and keeping her entertained can be full on mind. I take her to lots of classes and play groups where she can sing, dance, run around and play as much as she likes. Buzz is great after work and at the weekends too. He and Posey are like little partners in crime and at the moment, if I'm exhausted, I know they're ok and I can just chill. I feel fortunate.
I guess growing lots of litte follicles ready for egg collection is a very responsible job and with that comes an amount pressure, over-thinking and fear of what's coming. It's no wonder it's tiring!!!
x
I've been going to bed between 9 and 10pm every night (same as usual...!) and getting up between 6 and 7am. I'm definitely getting my 8 hours sleep, often more. Posey is great, she sleeps 7-7 every night plus around 2 hours at lunchtime, so it's not like I'm up and down with her at night! She's a little bag of energy in the day though and looking after her and keeping her entertained can be full on mind. I take her to lots of classes and play groups where she can sing, dance, run around and play as much as she likes. Buzz is great after work and at the weekends too. He and Posey are like little partners in crime and at the moment, if I'm exhausted, I know they're ok and I can just chill. I feel fortunate.
I guess growing lots of litte follicles ready for egg collection is a very responsible job and with that comes an amount pressure, over-thinking and fear of what's coming. It's no wonder it's tiring!!!
x
Saturday 4 May 2013
Day 4 of stimming
I really feel like everything is happening now I'm on my stims injections and it's almost like I'm determined to grow the 17(ish) little follicles I have!
Each evening I prepare my suprecur and gonal f doses and inject them into my tummy in turn. It's been ok so far although I must admit the area that I've been injecting into is starting to feel a little tender so I'll have to start being more adventurous!
By my estimations (based on my treatment before I had Posey and what the clinic nurses say) I'll be stimming for about another 12 days or so and then preparing for egg collection.
I'm looking forward to my next scan (this Tuesday) so I can see how my little follicles are growing. I hope they're doing well!
How do I feel? Ok actually. I've had the odd hot flush. The afternoon when I was getting Posey ready after her swimming lesson I had a big hot flush in the changing room, which was already hot, so that wasn't ideal! I get tired pretty early, but then that could just be from chasing an active toddler around. Apart from that I kind of feel normal. Which s good!
It's a bank holiday weekend this weekend so Buzz, Posey and I have lots of family time planned, perfect to keep me going up until my Tuesday scan :)
x
Each evening I prepare my suprecur and gonal f doses and inject them into my tummy in turn. It's been ok so far although I must admit the area that I've been injecting into is starting to feel a little tender so I'll have to start being more adventurous!
By my estimations (based on my treatment before I had Posey and what the clinic nurses say) I'll be stimming for about another 12 days or so and then preparing for egg collection.
I'm looking forward to my next scan (this Tuesday) so I can see how my little follicles are growing. I hope they're doing well!
How do I feel? Ok actually. I've had the odd hot flush. The afternoon when I was getting Posey ready after her swimming lesson I had a big hot flush in the changing room, which was already hot, so that wasn't ideal! I get tired pretty early, but then that could just be from chasing an active toddler around. Apart from that I kind of feel normal. Which s good!
It's a bank holiday weekend this weekend so Buzz, Posey and I have lots of family time planned, perfect to keep me going up until my Tuesday scan :)
x
Thursday 2 May 2013
Starting to inject the stims before my IVF treatment
Last night was day 1! Without getting way way ahead of myself I worked out that if I conceive with this round of treatment I will have a due date of February 5 2014! (Or perhaps closer to Xmas 2013 if Posey's little brother or sister had the same agenda as her...)
How was my first injection last night?
It was ok. It hurt more than the down reg ones but that's perhaps because on this phase of treatment there are 2 injections rather than just 1 every evening. It wasn't extremely painful, just uncomfortable. I have reduced my down reg dose of suprecur (burserelin) from 0.5to 0.2 and I'm taking a dose of 150 gonal f as my stims. The gonal f comes from an injection pen, which has recently been upgraded and is far easier to use than the old pen!
So for the next few days I need to be injecting my doses of suprecur and gonal f every evening. The gonal f will stimulate the follicles on both sides of my ovaries to grow grow grow!!
What's next?
I'm booked back in at the clinic next Tuesday morning for another scan to see how my little follies are growing, how the lining of my uterus is thickening up and for the nurses to assess my doses in case they need to be increased or decreased.
How do I feel?
Quite emotional / hormonal.
I have had 3 hot flushes so far today (it's only 10am..) and 2 other hot flushes woke me up in the night.
I also feel like I need a wee all the time. Not ideal!
Talking about non-IVF matters, today is a gorgeous day so Posey and I will be going to her dancing class and then to the park. Lovely :)
x
How was my first injection last night?
It was ok. It hurt more than the down reg ones but that's perhaps because on this phase of treatment there are 2 injections rather than just 1 every evening. It wasn't extremely painful, just uncomfortable. I have reduced my down reg dose of suprecur (burserelin) from 0.5to 0.2 and I'm taking a dose of 150 gonal f as my stims. The gonal f comes from an injection pen, which has recently been upgraded and is far easier to use than the old pen!
So for the next few days I need to be injecting my doses of suprecur and gonal f every evening. The gonal f will stimulate the follicles on both sides of my ovaries to grow grow grow!!
What's next?
I'm booked back in at the clinic next Tuesday morning for another scan to see how my little follies are growing, how the lining of my uterus is thickening up and for the nurses to assess my doses in case they need to be increased or decreased.
How do I feel?
Quite emotional / hormonal.
I have had 3 hot flushes so far today (it's only 10am..) and 2 other hot flushes woke me up in the night.
I also feel like I need a wee all the time. Not ideal!
Talking about non-IVF matters, today is a gorgeous day so Posey and I will be going to her dancing class and then to the park. Lovely :)
x
Wednesday 1 May 2013
My baseline scan
So after 2 weeks of down ragging yesterday was my baseline scan! It felt like a big day in the diary because if all was well, I'd be able to start my stims injections this week. It felt like we'd hopefully move onto the next phase of our IVF treatment.
Here's how the day went....
I woke up feeling very nervous but thankfully my appointment was at 9.30am so I didn't have long to wait. Buzz and I took Posey to nursery and off we went! Thankfully the clinic was running on time and I had my blood, scans and review all within an hour. The scan showed that I had 6-8 follicles in my left ovary and around 10 in my right - good numbers to start the stimming - hurray!! The lining of my uterus was also nice and thin and my bloods came back ok so the nurses are letting me start the stims today!!!!
Buzz and i felt very relieved when we left the clinic and happy that we could move on to the next stage of treatment. Buzz is going to help me with my first stims injection tonight. Of course I did it all last time when we conceived Posey but the injection pens have changed since then so 2 brains will be better than 1!
Buzz and I spent the rest of the day together, browsing the shops and having a nice lunch together before we picked up Posey from nursery. Then last night, I worked! Life goes on hey!
Roll on 7pm tonight x
Here's how the day went....
I woke up feeling very nervous but thankfully my appointment was at 9.30am so I didn't have long to wait. Buzz and I took Posey to nursery and off we went! Thankfully the clinic was running on time and I had my blood, scans and review all within an hour. The scan showed that I had 6-8 follicles in my left ovary and around 10 in my right - good numbers to start the stimming - hurray!! The lining of my uterus was also nice and thin and my bloods came back ok so the nurses are letting me start the stims today!!!!
Buzz and i felt very relieved when we left the clinic and happy that we could move on to the next stage of treatment. Buzz is going to help me with my first stims injection tonight. Of course I did it all last time when we conceived Posey but the injection pens have changed since then so 2 brains will be better than 1!
Buzz and I spent the rest of the day together, browsing the shops and having a nice lunch together before we picked up Posey from nursery. Then last night, I worked! Life goes on hey!
Roll on 7pm tonight x
Monday 29 April 2013
Day 14 of down regging
Hurray! So since AF arrived on Saturday I have been feeling much more normal. Not bloated, not exhausted and, well, ok actually.
Now AF has come and gone I feel fine about my baseline scan tomorrow morning. All being well I'll be able to start my stims injections in the next couple of days. The journey will still be a long one but it'll be the 'next stage' and mentally that means a lot to me.
Posey and I had a lovely day together today. We me friends at soft play this morning and took ourselves to the shops to choose some sample paint colours and wallpaper as Buzz and I are planning to decorate the lounge! Exciting times :)
x
Now AF has come and gone I feel fine about my baseline scan tomorrow morning. All being well I'll be able to start my stims injections in the next couple of days. The journey will still be a long one but it'll be the 'next stage' and mentally that means a lot to me.
Posey and I had a lovely day together today. We me friends at soft play this morning and took ourselves to the shops to choose some sample paint colours and wallpaper as Buzz and I are planning to decorate the lounge! Exciting times :)
x
Saturday 27 April 2013
Day 13 of down regging
Hurrah - AF has arrived! I've been concerned for days that AF was never going to come, and as my baseline scan is on day 16 I was getting a bit desperate! They don't let you have a baseline scan until your AF has arrived & I really didn't want starting the stims to be delayed so i'm very relieved today.
Buzz, Posey and I have a nice family weekend planned, which is perfect for relaxing me before my scan this week and also starting the stims this week
x
Buzz, Posey and I have a nice family weekend planned, which is perfect for relaxing me before my scan this week and also starting the stims this week
x
Wednesday 24 April 2013
Day 10 of down reg drugs
Well the last 10 days have gone surprisingly fast but there is 1 thing on my mind. I haven't had a bleed yet!
The nurse coordinators at my clinic said I should have a bleed between days 10-14 while i'm on my down reg injections, but there is no sign of a bleed and I must admit I'm starting to feel a little anxious about it.
The down reg drugs must be doing something because I feel exhausted in the evenings and I would normally have had my period on day 30/31 of my cycle and if I hadn't started the down ragging today would be day 31. Come on bleed!!! Got my baseline scan next Tuesday and I really hope I can start my stims soon after that.
X
The nurse coordinators at my clinic said I should have a bleed between days 10-14 while i'm on my down reg injections, but there is no sign of a bleed and I must admit I'm starting to feel a little anxious about it.
The down reg drugs must be doing something because I feel exhausted in the evenings and I would normally have had my period on day 30/31 of my cycle and if I hadn't started the down ragging today would be day 31. Come on bleed!!! Got my baseline scan next Tuesday and I really hope I can start my stims soon after that.
X
Saturday 20 April 2013
Is it the drugs or am I just moody?!
The sun is shining today, we are collecting new furniture but boy am I in a foul mood. I had a lovely evening out with friends last night and Buzz got up with Posey at 6.30 this morning so I could have a lie in. So why am I in such a bad mood?! I can't remember the DR drugs making me grumpy last time round but perhaps the added pressure of not being able to sit down and chill out (because Posey is a bundle of energy!) is sapping my energy!
Plans for the rest of today? To relax while Posey naps and then enjoy a nice walk in the sunshine later on :)x
Plans for the rest of today? To relax while Posey naps and then enjoy a nice walk in the sunshine later on :)x
Friday 19 April 2013
Day 5 of down regging!
Well I am now on day 5 of my DR injections and thankfully some of the side effects I thought I was having yesterday seem to have gone :) it's nice as I have way more energy today and I haven't had any hot flushes. On the other hand though now I'm worrying the drugs aren't working!!!
Oh well, I have a nice evening planned with some of my best mummy friends to look forward to tonight. I think it's important to divert your mind from IVF as much as possible as it keeps me sane!
x
Oh well, I have a nice evening planned with some of my best mummy friends to look forward to tonight. I think it's important to divert your mind from IVF as much as possible as it keeps me sane!
x
Thursday 18 April 2013
Day 4 of down regging
So I reckon I'm about 1/5 of my way into the down reg injections and today is the first day I can feel some side effects.
I woke up this morning after 8.5 hours of sleep and I felt like I'd had about an hour of sleep! I was shattered, and that's not like me. I also feel bloated today and I've had 2 hot flushes so far.
These things haven't stopped me doing anything yet but I can certainly tell I feel different today.
Not nice, but hopefully it all means the down reg drugs are working!
x
I woke up this morning after 8.5 hours of sleep and I felt like I'd had about an hour of sleep! I was shattered, and that's not like me. I also feel bloated today and I've had 2 hot flushes so far.
These things haven't stopped me doing anything yet but I can certainly tell I feel different today.
Not nice, but hopefully it all means the down reg drugs are working!
x
Tuesday 16 April 2013
My first down reg injection
So yesterday was a huge mixture of excitement as well as nervousness around starting my down regging....
Part of me felt like "hurray today is here!" Whereas another part of me felt like it was the start of a long, difficult journey and the side effects would be horrid. One of my best friends said that at least if the side effects are horrid then I know it's working! Sound advice....:)
Buzz and I got Posey ready for bed and fast asleep and then shut ourselves in our en-suite to administer the pain! I carefully unpacked my Supercur drugs, prepared the needle and then shot up! It went ok. I felt ok. And then I had half a pizza!
How do I feel today? Ok actually. Posey is at nursery and I am working so my mind is occupied :)
Any side effects yet? Nope. I feel like normal. Long may this continue!
x
Part of me felt like "hurray today is here!" Whereas another part of me felt like it was the start of a long, difficult journey and the side effects would be horrid. One of my best friends said that at least if the side effects are horrid then I know it's working! Sound advice....:)
Buzz and I got Posey ready for bed and fast asleep and then shut ourselves in our en-suite to administer the pain! I carefully unpacked my Supercur drugs, prepared the needle and then shot up! It went ok. I felt ok. And then I had half a pizza!
How do I feel today? Ok actually. Posey is at nursery and I am working so my mind is occupied :)
Any side effects yet? Nope. I feel like normal. Long may this continue!
x
Wednesday 10 April 2013
Going to the IVF clinic is emotional
I held tears back on the drive there, while I was there and on the drive back. In fact I held tears back until an hour ago, when I finished working for the day. Boy was it tough!
Why did I want to cry?
I think it's all just such an emotional thing to go through and having done it all before I'm scared of how the side effects like mood swings, tiredness and turning into a monster will affect me, especially with Posey around. It's going to be tough I think.
The nurses, consultants and in fact, everyone at the clinic is lovely. They smile, they ask how you are. They make you feel comfortable. I couldn't wish for more support from them. I'm fortunate.
So, deep breath! All I did was pick up some down reg drugs today. I know things are going to get much tougher so I must find some inner strength...from somewhere....x
Why did I want to cry?
I think it's all just such an emotional thing to go through and having done it all before I'm scared of how the side effects like mood swings, tiredness and turning into a monster will affect me, especially with Posey around. It's going to be tough I think.
The nurses, consultants and in fact, everyone at the clinic is lovely. They smile, they ask how you are. They make you feel comfortable. I couldn't wish for more support from them. I'm fortunate.
So, deep breath! All I did was pick up some down reg drugs today. I know things are going to get much tougher so I must find some inner strength...from somewhere....x
IVF Down reg drugs :-s
So, today is the day I pick up my down reg drugs. It feels like I've waited an age but today is finally here - hurray! I literally can't wait to get my hands on them!
x
x
Saturday 6 April 2013
The sun is shining and my upcoming IVF treatment feels ok!
Well what a difference the sunshine can make to how you feel!
Today has felt like the first day of Spring and Buzz, Posey and I made the most of it by going to the park where there are lots of farm animals. Posey loved the little lambs, ducks and pot belled pigs :). She enjoyed riding on the mini train and eating cookies in the cafe too. We had a really nice day.
A big part of me feels like I'd be so sad if Posey didn't have a little brother or sister to share days like this with, but at the same time it's also nice that Buzz and I get to shower her with ALL of our attention. I feel very fortunate x
Today has felt like the first day of Spring and Buzz, Posey and I made the most of it by going to the park where there are lots of farm animals. Posey loved the little lambs, ducks and pot belled pigs :). She enjoyed riding on the mini train and eating cookies in the cafe too. We had a really nice day.
A big part of me feels like I'd be so sad if Posey didn't have a little brother or sister to share days like this with, but at the same time it's also nice that Buzz and I get to shower her with ALL of our attention. I feel very fortunate x
Friday 5 April 2013
Positive Mental Attitude!
A the start of this year one of my best friends bought me a book called "Start the Day with Katie" written by Katie Piper. I think she is an amazing, inspirational girl and I have a huge amount of respect for her. Each day there is a statement. An inspiring and thoughtful statement, which really makes me think. I would totally recommend her book. I've been reading ahead a little....
1. The day I pick up my first IVF drugs - "If you feel anger, acknowledge it, then learn to let it go. The more it lingers, the greater it grows." I feel anger every day, anger that I have severe PCOS and can't just conceive a baby like 'that'. I'm a good mum and can provide for a big family. Life is unfair sometimes, but Katie is right. Anger gets you nowhere!
2. The day I believe I will start my IVF stims injections - "Focus on the individual steps you need to take to achieve your goals, rather than worrying about the entire journey." WOW! I'm going to really remember this one :)
3. The day after the day I believe my Egg Collection will happen - "A positive attitude will open many doors." Very true...
I can't think any further than that as it all depends on fertilisation and if/how many embryos we have. We got 1 out of 12 last time (but it was a good one = Posey!!) so I know not to count my chickens...
P M A !
x
1. The day I pick up my first IVF drugs - "If you feel anger, acknowledge it, then learn to let it go. The more it lingers, the greater it grows." I feel anger every day, anger that I have severe PCOS and can't just conceive a baby like 'that'. I'm a good mum and can provide for a big family. Life is unfair sometimes, but Katie is right. Anger gets you nowhere!
2. The day I believe I will start my IVF stims injections - "Focus on the individual steps you need to take to achieve your goals, rather than worrying about the entire journey." WOW! I'm going to really remember this one :)
3. The day after the day I believe my Egg Collection will happen - "A positive attitude will open many doors." Very true...
I can't think any further than that as it all depends on fertilisation and if/how many embryos we have. We got 1 out of 12 last time (but it was a good one = Posey!!) so I know not to count my chickens...
P M A !
x
Vivid dreams about being pregnant...
Perhaps I'm eating too much cheese! I'm having really vivid dreams about being pregnant!
I haven't even started my down reg drugs yet let alone my stims & my mind is already working overtime....
In my dream last night Posey was stroking my baby bump as I was lying on the sofa. She was pointing at it and saying 'Babbeeeee'. It was really sweet. Wow, I hope that dream turns into reality.
x
I haven't even started my down reg drugs yet let alone my stims & my mind is already working overtime....
In my dream last night Posey was stroking my baby bump as I was lying on the sofa. She was pointing at it and saying 'Babbeeeee'. It was really sweet. Wow, I hope that dream turns into reality.
x
Wednesday 3 April 2013
Emotions that come with wanting a baby
While you're going though fertility treatment you can really educate yourself on the drugs you take, the fertility investigations you'll go through, the waiting, the procedures......
It's very easy to think you'll sail through it as long as you 'carry on as normal.' I absolutely felt that way last time, before we conceived Posey, but this time I kinda know what's coming my way emotionally too, and I'm finding it hard to get my head around it in all honesty.
There are so many highs and lows that come with fertility treatment and I guess you have to hope it all ends with a high! So far:
Setting the consultation date = high
Waiting for that date = low
Having our consultation = high
Realising it would be another 20 odd days until we start my down-reg drugs = low
Imagining having another baby = high
Imagining it not working = low
Way too many things to think about!!! Help me - advice please to keep my emotions under control?
x
It's very easy to think you'll sail through it as long as you 'carry on as normal.' I absolutely felt that way last time, before we conceived Posey, but this time I kinda know what's coming my way emotionally too, and I'm finding it hard to get my head around it in all honesty.
There are so many highs and lows that come with fertility treatment and I guess you have to hope it all ends with a high! So far:
Setting the consultation date = high
Waiting for that date = low
Having our consultation = high
Realising it would be another 20 odd days until we start my down-reg drugs = low
Imagining having another baby = high
Imagining it not working = low
Way too many things to think about!!! Help me - advice please to keep my emotions under control?
x
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